


maybe one day

by mumblingmaria



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Heist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-21
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-01-20 17:54:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12438432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mumblingmaria/pseuds/mumblingmaria
Summary: Low on credits and as desperate as they always are, Hera and her crew take on a job from a new employer. Though a little wary, they go in full throttle to steal from the Empire, as they do. It should be an easy job but when have they ever had one of those?





	1. The Offer

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so excited to finally start posting this! It's been written for awhile and it's going through the edit phase still but here it is! The first chapter of my heist fic! It's here! I'm amazed! I'll probably post the chapters as soon as the editing for them is complete. I can't promises a schedule cause life gets in the way sometimes. I promise the whole fic is done, though. It's been done awhile, but need a lot of work that it is getting now. It's going to take time. But you will get that sweet, sweet closure. 
> 
> Thank you so much to my dear friend Gwen for doing the much much MUCH needed editing. You don't even watch SWR but you're helping your girl out. I am so beyond grateful. You've made my mess into something readable. Thank you.
> 
> And thank you to everyone who put up with me as I wrote this. I'm sure I was incredibly annoying as I planned and wrote and yelled about this. Thank you for being patient. It's finally fucking here.

Hera tried to stifle a yawn as she walked out of the cockpit. She may not have been as productive that morning as she would have liked to be, but she was tired. Instead of doing her weekly check over of the ship, Hera had mostly read old reports from jobs that Zeb, Kanan, and she had done, looking for ways to improve in the future. It wasn’t pointless, sure, but it was her go-to activity when she didn’t want to actually do work.

She glanced around as her yawn continued but she knew she was alone. Chopper was the only other member of the crew on the _Ghost_ and was nowhere to be seen, so there really was no need to hide the yawn. But she did nonetheless. Some habits were hard to break. She was used to giving off the air of being the most rested of the team, even if she generally got the least amount of sleep out of her two companions.

Caf would fix this. Heading towards the galley, Hera stretched as she walked, trying to wake her body up. It was stiff from the few hours she'd spent reconfiguring the _Ghost_ 's systems before giving into her lack of motivation. Some exercise sounded amazing in that moment, but there was still work to do and she didn’t want to leave the ship while Zeb and Kanan were gone. Maybe when they got back, she could go into the spaceport for a walk, giving her body an actual stretch. 

Pouring herself a cup, she sighed. The caf wasn’t as hot as she’d like, but she wasn’t about to waste the unfinished pot made that morning. Not when they were as pressed for credits as they were. She added some sweetener in the hopes that it would make it easier to drink. Hera sipped it and grimaced at the temperature nonetheless. She never understood how Kanan could down a cold cup of this like it was water.

Kanan. Her thoughts clung to him in a rather annoying way. She leaned against the counter, cradling the cup in her hands. Hera thought of how they had ended up spending the night together. Waking up wrapped in his arms this morning had been… nicer than she wished it had been. 

Things would be so much easier if she didn’t _like_ waking up next to him. She was doing her best to make sure they hadn’t had that many nights together in the four years of partnership, and even less since Zeb had joined them. But the nights were there. 

Whatever was going on between them needed to be contained. And, despite her better judgment, it was a relationship. They had talked that much over, at least. A relationship that, one day, they were going to have to put on hold. It was unsustainable with the lives they were choosing to live. Hera was confident that Kanan was aware of how she felt, and that he was more than willing to pretend the issue wasn’t there. But it was. And it was going to grow. There wasn’t room for romance when they were trying to fight for the galaxy.

The sound of the door to the galley opening and a loud “Whump whump!” grabbed Hera’s attention. She looked over to see her droid in the hatchway.

“What was that, Chop?” she asked before taking another sip, grimacing at the temperature again. 

He chattered at her, the tired and grumpy sounds he always made putting a smile on her face.

“Five minutes? I’ll meet them in the hold,” she said, pushing herself up from the counter.

She followed Chopper as they made their way down through the ship, neither of them in much of a hurry. She did a quick check of the cockpit before taking the ladder down to the hold. Just as her feet touched the floor, Kanan and Zeb walked onto the ship, pushing two relatively small crates on board.

“Good shopping trip?” asked Hera, grinning over her now very cold caf. She walked to the middle of the hold and watched them push the crates to the side.

“It was delightful; we only got half of what we needed and we’re almost out of credits,” Kanan responded. He turned the repulsors on the crates off and stretched his arms over his head, then he and Zeb made their way over to Hera. When the two men stopped in front of her, Kanan reached out and took the caf from her hands, taking a large drink from it. He spluttered after downing the gulp and raised an eyebrow at Hera. She shrugged in response. Shaking his head, Kanan continued, “We did get the most of the important stuff, though.”

“But,” Zeb jumped in, grinning down at her, “we’ve got a potential job. Lots of supplies, lots of credits. Just need you to say yes.”

“Oh?” She raised an eyebrow. Kanan offered her the cup back but she shook her head. “What’s the job?”

“Now, don’t say no right away,” Kanan started, then drained the caf. Hera crossed her arms and looked between the two. They often came to her with ideas for work that she would shoot down, either because the reward wasn’t worth the effort, or because it would draw too much direct attention from the Empire. She wondered which it would be this time. “This Devaronian overheard us complaining about the lack of credits and offered us a job.”

“And did this Devaronian have a name?”

“Vizago. He runs… an organization on Lothal,” Kanan said. Hera shook her head, trying not to laugh. She wasn’t against working with criminals; how could she be? She was one of them, technically. But it was very telling that Kanan was wary of giving her all the details on this man.

Zeb cut in, seeming to realizing Kanan was going to struggle at making their case. “It’s a criminal organization, sure. But the work is good. Well, it is a crime, but it’s stealing from the Empire, so it’s good work.”

“Well, you have my attention,” Hera said, smiling up at him. “What would we have to do?”

“Well, there’s an Imperial base on Felucia that’s supposed to be receiving a big shipment of medical supplies, rations, weapons, the whole works,” Kanan said, taking over again. He slung an arm around Hera and guided her to the ladder out of the hold. She let him steer her. Hera led the way to the common area as he continued talking. “Vizago said that it shouldn’t be guarded too heavily, so we can easily lift a few crates off them, or all of them, ideally. The only catch is that we have give the weapons we acquire to Vizago.”

“It’s right up our alley, Hera,” Zeb said, leaning against the table. He grinned at her as she stood in the middle of the room. “Nothing we haven’t done before.”

Hera nodded. It was a simple job. Felucia was in the Outer Rim, so within the region they were willing to operate. They had hit Imperial convoys that were considered hard to hit more than once. And they were really in need of a job.

“When do we do this?” she asked, watching as Kanan leaned against the ladder to the Phantom. “How long is this supposed to take us?”

“Vizago said the shipment is going to land on the planet in a little under a week, so we should get there the day before the shipment moves. Once it’s en route, we’ll have maybe half a day to intercept it before it hits the base. Vizago wants his share within a week of completing the job, delivered to him on Lothal.” Kanan laid it all out. He pointed at her with the hand still holding the cup. “It’s up to you, Captain Hera, but we both think it’s a good job.”

“I agree,” she smiled at him before turning back to Zeb. “Good work, both of you. How fast until you’re both ready? I want everything you brought back put away as quickly as possible before we leave. Felucia is a long enough trip in hyperspace; I don’t want to put it off.” 

“Couple hours?” Zeb asked, looking over at Kanan. He nodded, smiling openly. “A couple hours.”

“Good. Tell Chopper how to contact Vizago, then get to work,” she said. Zeb nodded and got up, making his way out of the common area. He glanced back once and rolled his eyes as the door shut, cutting him from her view. Hera turned around and saw that Kanan had made no move to leave his perch on the ladder. She raised an eyebrow at him. “I think I just told you to get to work.”

He pushed himself off the ladder and took a few steps towards her. Turning the cup around in his hand, he looked her over. “You did, and I will,” he responded.

“Mhmm,” Hera hummed, taking a step towards him. She reached out and let her hand brush down the side of his arm before grabbing hold of his hand, the one holding the cup. He grinned down at her and she rolled her eyes. She knew what he was thinking. Hera smiled up at him and slipped the cup out of his grasp. “Maybe you should get to it, now.”

He ignored her suggestion, still grinning down at her. “It’s going to be a good job; I can feel it,” Kanan said. They were standing a foot apart from each other. And, though Kanan was keeping the conversation on business, Hera knew that any moment he might try and cross the line into personal.

Shaking her head, she moved around him and headed into the galley. “Is that so?” she asked as she left to empty cup on the counter. She made her way back to the doorway, stopping there to watch him. “Is that a Jedi feeling?”

Shaking his head, he turned to leave the common area. “No,” he answered, “just my criminal intuition I picked up from all the days spent with you.”

“Because you were never a criminal before you met me,” she laughed. She watched him as the door opened and her curiosity was starting to get the better of her, despite knowing she should start prepping for the job. And that she really should make Kanan go and help Zeb. But she also wanted all the information.

“Did Vizago say how he came about this job on Felucia? Lothal is close enough to Felucia, but you don’t hear about it in relation to… well, anything. Did he say anything?” Hera asked.

Kanan turned in the doorway and shrugged. “Didn’t mention anything. I just assumed he has contacts all around the galaxy previous to him settling on Lothal. And like you said, they’re close enough.”

Hera sighed, nodding as she thought over the information. While still eager for the work, she was starting to wish she had met Vizago with Kanan and Zeb. She didn’t like working for a complete stranger. She asked, “Why did this Vizago give you this job?”

“Honestly? I think Zeb impressed him. You know, big guy, lots of muscle,” Kanan answered while pretending to flex his muscles. Hera chuckled. He grinned and took another, more exaggerated, pose. Her chuckles turned into a full laugh, leaving Kanan looking very pleased with himself. “But it might have also been the looks of desperation on our faces. Desperate people will do almost anything.”

Her smile faded as she felt her laughter leave her completely. Desperate they were. Hera wondered what it would feel like not to be desperate. How long had it been since any of them went longer than a week without it? They’ve all been fighting for years, struggling to survive, not to get caught. While that desperation kept them alive, it also kept them trapped. But then, what if they won? Would that desperation leave, or was it a part of her now ingrained into her bones?

“Captain Hera, are you in there?” Kanan had moved in front of her, leaning in slightly. She sighed and stepped away from him.

“Yes, Kanan. Just a little tired,” she said. She looked him up and down before smirking. “I got a lot more sleep before my crew got bigger, nothing keeping me up at night.”

He returned the smirk to her, closing the distance between them again. “If I’m recalling the events of last night correctly,” he said, leaning down to her, “there weren’t any complaints about me keeping you up.”

“I wasn’t referring to you specifically,” Hera replied, patting his chest. She walked past him and made her way to the door. “I meant you and Zeb in general. You keep me up worrying about how you’ll make my life difficult.”

Kanan pantomimed his chest being shot as though her words were the blaster shots. “You wound me, Hera.”

She laughed, shaking her head. It was easy to slip into these routines with him. He made it so easy sometimes to forget they had work to do. The smile on her face lessened and she looked over her shoulder to him, still in the exaggerated position. “Get to work, Kanan.”

He saluted her as she left the room.

She made her way back to the cockpit and slid into the pilot’s chair. Chopper rolled up beside her, whistling a number of questions at her.

“Yes, yes, we’re taking the job,” she muttered back to him. “We’re going to Felucia.”  


Her droid spewed out a stream of sounds at her before connecting to the ship to calculate their jump.

“Yes, I know it’s a risky job, Chop. But we’ve done riskier,” she glanced at Chopper as he worked. He waved his hands at her. “You’re just trying to be difficult.”

He responded in his usual rude tone and Hera laughed.

While Kanan and Zeb were making sure all the supplies were stored properly, Hera contacted Vizago to confirm their taking of the job and to get whatever intel he had to offer. She then made sure everything was ready for their departure. She finished up a quick version of her weekly check up, kicking herself for the laziness in the morning. While she could get a fair amount it completed during hyperspace travel, it would have been nice to know before accepting a job that the _Ghost_ was ready to work. What if there was something wrong? 

She shook the thought out of her head. If something was actually wrong with her ship they couldn’t deal with it now, not with the lack of credits. In one week, they would have credits and supplies. One week. It would be nice for the three of them to not have to worry about having a decent meal again, or wondering if they’d end up stranded in space because they fuel ran out. At least until the need for a new job arose.

Excitement coursed through her. She had to admit she did like doing these types of jobs, even if only to herself. There was no denying the thrill of action, and the thrill of outdoing the Empire. So when Kanan and Zeb appeared in the cockpit, sliding into their respective seats, Hera quickly closed up the _Ghost_ and took off. She was ready for what was going to be thrown at them.


	2. Intel

Zeb stretched upwards as they walked off the _Ghost_. Felucia was a warm planet, filled with jungles. It was already getting to be late in the afternoon, though the setting sun was doing nothing to cut the heat emanating everywhere. They landed in the ship pot of Niango, a bustling city that wasn’t actually that large, just full. It was clear this was one of the more popular trading destinations on the planet. The air was tight from all the people that were already surrounding them as they made their way out of the port and into the market.

Hera was leading them through the city’s streets, watching their surroundings closely. They didn’t know yet just how big the Empire’s presence was and they obviously didn’t know whom to trust. This was always the worst part of any job. Zeb noticed how tense Hera was when they were landing and preparing to leave the ship. While they all agreed this mission was something they could do in their sleep, that was only true for attempting the heist itself. Getting there was going to be challenging.

They hadn’t been given much information from Vizago. He had told them which city was the closest to the Imperial base and what day the shipment would be moved. Hera had tried to contact him again while they were en route to find out anything else when she decided they were not given enough, but no luck. It was clear they were going in fairly blind. Kanan had tried to encourage them by making the argument (again) that they had done harder jobs with no information at all, but Zeb agreed with Hera. More information would have been nice.

And it didn’t help that Felucia was so humid. He had never been to Felucia before and Zeb wished that were still the case. Even with the short walk they had made from the _Ghost_ , Zeb was uncomfortable under all of his fur.

“Now we know why I’ve never visited Felucia before,” he muttered to Kanan, who only grinned back at him. Chopper, rolling ahead of the two men, chortled back, declaring his obvious enjoyment in his discomfort.

“Sorry, Zeb,” Hera called back to him, a grin on her face as well. He gestured for her to keep moving, not wanting any of her fake sympathy. She and Kanan had the opportunity to wear lighter clothing for this mission; Zeb was stuck with his fur.

Kanan was sporting a simple green shirt with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows and his collar loose and open. While his grey pants were the same as always, Zeb was jealous nonetheless by the lighter clothing. Hera was completely covered, flight cap and gloves were on as always, but she wasn’t wearing the flight suit she normally wore about the ship. That would have been too much in the humidity of Felucia. She had grey work pants on, a looser fit than Kanan’s pair. Her jacket was short, landing at her waist, and was undone to reveal a black shirt. Zeb could see the zipper on the back of the shirt, which would have allowed her to get into it with ease. He looked over the two and sighed. Maybe there was a fur removal shop somewhere in this city—he could be the first hairless Lasat.

They made their way to the centre of the city. It was just as crowded here, everyone rushing to the next stand, the next vendor. Zeb often felt in the way when thrust into the constant motion of a city like this. Most crowds were wary of his looming size and Zeb hated feeling out of place again. Ever since joining Hera on her ship, he felt like he had somewhere to call his own, but since they were constantly travelling around the galaxy, it left him off centre whenever they weren’t on the ship. Zeb wondered if he’d ever feel at home in a city again.

“Hey, Zeb,” Kanan said as he nudged his side. Zeb looked down at him in question. “We’re going to split up now. You’re going to figure out how much of an Imperial presence there is.”

“Sounds good. Who am I with?” Zeb asked, looking between his companions. When Hera met his gaze with a sympathetic look, he sighed. “Hera, are you sticking me with your droid?”

She reached over and patted his arm while Kanan merely smirked at him. “Kanan got him last time.”

“But Kanan actually understands what he says,” he grumbled, glaring down at the orange astromech. Chopper waved his arms at him before charging off into the crowd. Zeb threw his glare towards Hera before taking off after the droid.

“We’ll contact you in an hour or so about where to meet,” Hera called after him.

Zeb waved a hand back at her and continued off into the crowd. Chopper stopped at the opening of a street. The two looked at each other, then started down the street. Zeb looked at the shops they passed, wondering where to begin.

They couldn’t seem like they were trying to gather information. Zeb didn’t want to give away what they were up to, but it was crucial to figure out what the Imperial status was here.

He could just go up to the locals and ask whether or not they felt like the Empire was destroying their lives. Effective, but it would definitely bring on too much attention, and probably end up with a fair amount of blaster fire. While he was used to that, Zeb wasn’t feeling up to running for his life. He could trying going to a cantina, just listen to what was being said around him and hope that the conversations would end up on the relevant topics. But that wasn’t a guarantee. He didn’t want to meet back up with Hera empty handed.

So, how to go about it?

Zeb stopped walking, ignoring the confused sound Chopper let out. He looked up and down the street, gauging his surroundings. It was clear they were still in the shopping district now; stands of all kinds littered the already cramped space. Clothing, jewellery, droid parts, and food were available to anyone with enough credits and energy for shopping.

“Oi, Chopper,” Zeb said, bumping the top of the droid. Chopper turned to him quickly, running into his leg. “Watch it! I’m just trying to tell you where I’m going! I’ll never understand why Hera doesn’t scrap you for parts.”

Chopper bleated and Zeb shook his head. He never understood what exactly the droid was saying to him but he always knew when it was rude (which, granted, was the majority of the time). He looked away from Chopper and sighed. “I’m going to that food stand. Don’t destroy anything; I don’t want to explain that to Hera,” he said before heading off. He heard Chopper grumble and roll after him, though he kept a fair distance back.

The food stand had a variety of meats cooking and Zeb had no idea what any really were. It didn’t matter; he wasn’t worried about food at the moment. He was concerned with the locals all standing around it, all of them seeming to be in less than stellar moods and clearing complaining about something. Zeb grinned as he made his way over. This was exactly what he wanted: unhappy people whose mouths are loosened by food.

“I’ll take two of whatever that is,” Zeb said, pointing to a skewer with an orange meat on it. The vendor nodded as accepted the credits. Zeb glanced at the Felucian next to him and grinned. “What can I expect from this?”

The local chuckled. “Very hot. I’m sure you can handle it.”

Zeb laughed in return and accepted the two skewers. After taking a bite, which was indeed filled with a fair amount of heat, he looked back that the Felucian he was speaking to. “I couldn’t help but notice the mood wasn’t great when I came over here. Eat too many of these?” He took another bite of the meat skewer.

The group around him sighed, some shaking their heads. “No,” he answered. “Lost another farm.” He gestured to a female Felucian who hung her head.

“Lost another farm?” Zeb asked, looking the farmers over. “Disease or what, a drought?”

“The Empire.”

Jackpot. Zeb was impressed by how quickly he’d found the right group to talk to; luck really was on his side today. Normally he struggled to get people to open up to him, though he generally had an easier time with other aliens. Solidarity against the Empire’s treatment of the “less desirable galactic citizens.”

“They’ve been forcing us off our lands to the east of the city. One by one we’ve been losing our livelihoods. Forced into either building their roads or finding work here in the city,” the farmer explained. “There’s been five of us now.”

Shaking his head, Zeb lowered his second skewer. It was hard to stay pleased with this find. “To the east, you said?”

The farmer nodded. He turned his attention back to his group and Zeb nodded to the vendor. He turned and headed back to Chopper, who was on the other side of the street, apparently chatting with a local droid.

“Let’s get going,” Zeb said, hitting the top of the orange droid. He was answered with a few consecutive whacks on his leg from Chopper. Rolling his eyes, Zeb led the way further down the street. Chopper grumbled beside him.

They wandered through the city, picking up on more snippets of information. It was starting to become clear just how large the Imperial presence here was, or, rather, how large it was getting. The people here were unhappy, as seemed to often be the case in the Outer Rim. 

Zeb let out a low growl. It was more to himself than anyone around him. He noticed Chopper looking up at him, letting out a softer noise than Zeb had ever heard from the droid.

He shook his head and continued walking. “Don’t worry about it,” he muttered. He wasn’t actually sure if Chopper had been trying to show concern and, frankly, he didn’t care to find out. The odds of that were too low.

“ _Spectre Four, come in,_ ” Hera’s voice came in through the comm.

Zeb lifted it and responded, “I’m here, Spectre Two. We’re regrouping?”

“ _Yes. We’re at a cantina called the Rancor’s Breath. And,_ ” she continued, “ _tell Spectre Three to head back to the_ Ghost.”

“Copy that, but he’s not going to be happy,” Zeb chuckled. He secured his comlink back in his belt before pointing in the direction of the _Ghost_ to Chopper. “Off we go.”

 

The Rancor’s Breath was aptly named. Zeb was confident Hera couldn’t have found more of a dive if she had tried (he had a feeling she had tried). The three of them were sitting in the back at a secluded booth, watching the crowds of drunken patrons come and go. Gambling and enjoying their time. Drinking and shouting away the problems the galaxy seemed to bring more and more of every day. The smell was horrible. It was everything they needed. No one was going to try to overhear them because no one cared about yet another group of strangers. Hell, no one was even going to even look in their direction.

Zeb leaned back on his seat, surveying the room. The food they had eaten was surprisingly decent, much better than rations. He and Kanan had polished off their dinners quickly, enjoying the chance to indulge a little. They hadn’t begun to plan the next stage of the mission. They all felt it would have been too obvious if they had started talking business right away.

Turning his attention back to the table, Zeb caught Kanan reaching across Hera to steal a forkful of her dinner. She looked up from her datapad, which had been the reason for her neglected food, and frowned.

“Really, Kanan?” she asked, pulling her plate closer to her. He winked at Zeb as he put the fork in his mouth. “Just go get another order if you’re still hungry.”

Smirking, Kanan dragged himself out of the booth, taking his plate with him. Hera shook her head, though her eyes softened as they followed Kanan to the bar.

Zeb snorted. “Careful, Hera,” he said. “Your crew might start thinking that there’s something going on between you two.”

She didn’t indulge him with a proper response. After throwing a cold look in his direction, Hera went back to reading her datapad, once again ignoring her plate. She did, however, take a quick bite of her food the moment Kanan returned to the table. When she inched away from him as he sat down, Zeb shook his head. He often forgot how much younger she was. It was odd to be reminded of that, even if it rarely happened. It was only when they were given a chance to actually relax that her age would finally show. He shook his head again when Kanan raised an eyebrow. Kanan shrugged in response and put a forkful of food in his mouth.

“Well, now that we’ve eaten,” Hera started, putting her datapad down on the table and ignoring the indignant look she was given from Kanan, “let’s get to work. Zeb, what did you find out?”

“I’m pretty sure that the Imperials have their base to the east of here. Spoke to a bunch of farmers; all the farms to the east have been destroyed with a road being built over the land,” Zeb answered, leaning in. “A lot of unhappy farmers building a road right to that Imperial base. I don’t see the locals being too upset if there was a hit on the base.”

Hera nodded. “We found that to be the attitude all around the city,” she said, leaning back and crossing her arms. Her brows knitted together and she let out a sigh. Kanan glanced over at her before pulling the datapad over to himself. She watched him and continued, “It’s barely been a year of the Empire really cracking down here and it’s already so clear how much damage has been done.”

“Well, let’s crack down on the Empire,” Kanan replied, looking over the information in his hands. “Hera and I managed to… acquire the shipment’s schedule. Well, at least when it’s going to be leaving the city.”

Hera and Zeb shared a smirk while Kanan spoke. They were all very good at… acquiring knowledge now. Zeb was curious as to how they got it, since Chopper was with him. He could practically see the convoluted plan Kanan had come up with to achieve their goal.

“They’re heading out at oh-seven-hundred tomorrow,” Kanan started to drum his fingers against the table as he spoke, “which means an early start for us.”

“Zeb, you said to the east?” Hera asked, leaning over to look at the datapad. He nodded and she proceeded to search through their intel. Under her breath, Hera started to mutter details until she grinned. “About 10 klicks down that road you mentioned. That’s where we can hit them. It should be well in between Niango and this secret base.”

Kanan stretched his arms up over his head and let them rest along the top of the booth’s seats. After an exaggerated sigh, he said, “So a really early start.”

“We should head back to the _Ghost_. Get everything ready now and call it a night,” Hera said, turning that datapad off. She stood up and smiled at them. “We’ll go over more of the details on the ship, too.”

Kanan saluted her as she edged her way out of the booth and then followed her out of the cantina. Zeb brought up the rear.

Their walk back to the ship was uneventful, which wasn’t really that surprising, but Zeb was always grateful for a normal and peaceful walk with the crew. Hera commed Chopper to let him know they were coming while Kanan and Zeb walked a few paces behind her, taking in the sights around them.

The sun was below the horizon now, though the sky hadn’t gone completely dark. The streets were still crowded and the air was still sticking to every part of Zeb’s body. He was ready to get back on the ship, even if it was only for the night.

“You know…” Kanan said as they made their way onto the ship. Hera was already halfway up the ladder out of the hold when he spoke. “This mission has really turned out to be a good fit. Right up our alley at exactly the right time.”

Zeb nodded in agreement as he went to shut the ramp onto the ship. “It always cheers me up when I know we’re going to throw a wrench into Imperial plans. It makes up for the humidity on this planet completely.”

He was answered with a laugh. The two men made their way out of the hold and up to the cockpit to meet their leader again. “Don’t bother cleaning up; you’ll be back out in the pleasant scenery of Felucia before you know it.”

Giving him a small shove forward, Zeb sat down behind Hera and angled himself to see both seats in front of him with ease. They quickly fell into planning mode again, working out all the kinks that might arise on the mission.

Kanan was right; this mission was exactly what the three of them needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter two is here! As you've probably picked up, the POV in this fic is going to change pretty much every chapter. This is my first time ever switching POVs in a fic and it was a really fun challenge. I liked working to make the story continue to flow through the character shifts while making sure each of the three voices were different. I hope it worked out as well as I think it did.
> 
> Thank you again to my dear friend Gwen for editing this.


	3. Misfire

“Again?” Kanan muttered and blinked three times as a fly flew straight into his face. He waved it off for the second time that morning with a sigh. His back and neck were getting sweatier from the sun as it continued its climb higher and higher in the sky. It didn’t help they had already been drenched from the walk to the jump site. They had gotten to the location long before the shipment would even leave the city, giving them ample time to lay out the best plan and bake slowly in the Felucian heat. It had already been a tiring morning and the action hadn’t even started.

An hour after their arrival at the jump site, Kanan leaned against the boulder he was using as cover, boredom from the wait starting to weigh down on him. He had a clear view of the road from where he was hidden. They had placed him on higher ground, Hera knowing very well the advantage that would give him. If Kanan looked over the boulder to his right, he could see where Zeb and Hera were staked out, behind a group of the large blue flowers they saw throughout the planet’s jungle, though he couldn’t actually see them. They were hidden at the top of a ravine that trailed alongside the road. It didn’t stop him from trying every now and then to catch a glimpse of Hera’s green lekku or the purple of Zeb’s fur.

With a sigh, Kanan gave up and he repositioned himself slightly. The road was still empty, the sun was still beating down, and that fly was back.

The minutes until the transport’s scheduled pass seemed to drag by. The air around him clung to his clothing, making every movement more uncomfortable than necessary. There was no breeze that morning, which could have alleviated some of the discomfort from the moist heat that was sticking to their group. Everything was still. Each minute that passed pulled at his skin, irritating every nerve in his body. Kanan was ready to do something, but the galaxy was forcing him to just wait.

He knew it wasn’t just a mix of his boredom and the humidity feeding his bad mood. It wasn’t the mission and all its irritations, not entirely. It was Hera. Or, rather, Hera _and_ him. He wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead and glanced off in Hera’s general direction. No matter how many times he tried to keep his focus on the mission, she kept slipping back into his mind.

They had been partners for four years now and he still didn’t know where he stood with her. Of course, that wasn’t entirely true; he knew that they were partners and he knew that they could, and did, trust each other completely. She was his best friend. She was the person who saved his life, and he was pretty sure that she was aware of that by now. Hera had led Kanan to a life worth living again. And, Kanan knew that he loved her. What Kanan didn’t know was if she loved him back. Loved him back in the way he wanted her to. He didn’t need her to, but there was a definite want for it. A longing.

Hera and Kanan were coming to their relationship from different backgrounds, from different upbringings, from different ways of thinking. He acknowledged that; Kanan wasn’t going to pressure Hera into a life she didn’t want. But he wondered constantly what it was that she actually wanted from him. Every now and then she would come to him seeking… something. He willingly gave all of himself to her, so Kanan figured she always found what she was searching for even if what that was remained a mystery to him.

He knew Hera would sometimes call their scattered nights accidents, mistakes, moments when she needed to forget that they were fighting what was arguably a losing battle. When she wanted to forget the road that brought them to where they were.

Kanan refused to call those times together accidents. He would argue that those were moments not to forget the fight that controlled their lives, but to remember it. Those nights lying together reminded him of what he had to fight for. Kanan longed for when he could lose himself in Hera and recharge his fire for her. He wanted to share what he felt when he was with her, both physically and emotionally.

But that was the cause of his frustrations with her and their relationship; he wanted to tell Hera just how much he loved her. But every day that passed, Kanan was more and more aware that the end of it was coming. They were always going to be partners; she was always going to be his best friend, but it was clear that the days of the physical side to what they had going were numbered. He was scared that if he confessed just how deeply he cared for her, Hera would end it right then and there.

He wasn’t mad that it was going to end. Kanan understood why Hera was going to put a stop to it—splitting their focus between each other and fighting the Empire was difficult at best—but that didn’t mean he had to help it along. That didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy the numbered days while he had them.

No, he wasn’t frustrated with Hera. He was frustrated that it took a war for them to meet and that that war was the leading contender for keeping them from having the future he wanted with her. (He was frustrated that he knew she was right. He was frustrated that he agreed with her on some level.)

A sound in the distance pulled Kanan’s out of his thoughts. He looked up and over the boulder before dropping down again; the transport was finally arriving.

“Hey, Spectres Two and Four, our target is incoming,” Kanan said into his comlink.

“ _Copy that, Spectre One._ ” Hera’s voice came out of the comm and Kanan let a small smile grow on his face; it had been well over an hour since he had heard her speak. “ _What are we working with? We can’t see them yet._ ”

Kanan waited a moment before looking over the top of his hiding spot again. He did a quick count before dropping out of sight and answered, “I have visuals on six troopers and one officer. Could be one or two more inside the transport I can’t see. There are four outside the transport. They’ll be here in five minutes, give or take.”

“ _Perfect; all this waiting around has left me itching for a good fight,_ ” Zeb chuckled.

“ _Wait, there are four outside?_ ” Hera asked.

A beat later, Zeb’s voice came through the comm again. “ _Spectre Two is right; it does seem weird that they’ve got buckets outside of the transport. That’s got to have slowed them down. A lot._ ”

Kanan frowned. He looked at the oncoming transport and noticed just how slow it was moving. That did seem odd. Now that he was thinking about it, he realized that the transport was getting to this point of its route a good twenty minutes later than they were told. Their source had said that the shipment would have left Niango at oh-seven-hundred and that was now an hour and a half ago.

“Maybe locals have been giving them trouble,” Kanan supplied. “Or the Imperials are just nervous.”

“ _Be on guard,_ ” Hera said. Even through the comlink, Kanan could hear that an edge had found its way into her voice. He stiffened slightly and looked over at their incoming target. “ _We’re going to stick to the plan but don’t do anything reckless._ ”

He was starting to get a bad feeling about this.

As the transport neared, Kanan drew his blaster and crouched next to his boulder. Their plan was simple. Kanan would draw their fire and then Hera and Zeb would flank them. If everything went according to the plan, which Kanan realized rarely happened, they’d be able to commandeer the transport to the rendezvous point with Chopper and make their way off planet without any loss of limb.

Kanan flexed his hand and let out a breath he was holding. It was always the moment right before he jumped into a fight that he wished he were the Jedi he was supposed to be (he ignored the fact that Caleb Dume would never have been crouching next to a boulder getting ready to steal; Caleb would have been finished his training by now and perhaps would have taken on a Padawan learner, something Kanan would never get to do). He wasn’t connecting to the Force. Not like he should be. It was there—it was always there—but Kanan wasn’t at the point where he wanted it to be there. He knew it was helping him but he wasn’t at his full potential. He wasn’t trying to be.

Shaking off the nagging feeling that something was definitely going to go wrong, Kanan refocused his attention to the road. The target was mere seconds from hitting the mark. Ten, nine, eight… Now!

The first bolt he fired landed square in a stormtrooper’s chest, knocking the soldier to the ground. Kanan fired three more shots, with less care this time, before running out towards the troopers. An explosion behind him confirmed his prediction that a grenade would be thrown; Kanan had gotten into enough fights with stormtroopers to know how the fight would go.

Dodging blaster bolts, he weaved his way towards the road. After firing again, Kanan hid behind one of the tall and bulbous trees.

“Anytime now, Hera…” he muttered under his breath. He glanced at the road and saw that the troopers, five of them, were making their way towards him. They were leaving the transport completely vulnerable. “That’s bad, even for buckets.”

He dashed out from his cover and fired at the closest trooper. They dropped, but the other four continued towards him. Kanan looked around to figure out where to go next. The troopers were spreading out in a line, blasters raised. He could go back up, drawing them further away from their cargo. Or, he could try and break through and meet up with Hera and Zeb.

Blaster shots hitting the transport drew the attention of the stormtroopers and Kanan. Hera and Zeb had joined the fight. Two troopers turned back and began to trot down to the vehicle. Kanan aimed his blaster at one of the remaining troopers and began to squeeze the trigger.

“ _KANAN!_ ”

Hera’s voice ripped through the comm and air. There had only been a handful of times since Kanan joined up with Hera that he wasn’t pleased to hear her say his name. Most of those were during the first few months together when they were trying to figure out how to live together (and Kanan was trying to figure out how to actually live). Since then, it was whenever Hera was in trouble. Kanan looked across the road, past the transport, and saw the helmets of four more stormtroopers accompanied by the sound of blaster fire. They hadn’t left one side unguarded; the Imperials had set up a trap. A trap that they had walked into.

Kanan swore under his breath and fired the shot he had set up. The trooper had moved closer but that only made it easier; the bolt had hit them in their neck. They dropped instantly. Kanan turned and immediately recoiled in pain. He grabbed his side and glared up. The other stormtrooper had reached him and started his attack with a stun stick in hand. For whatever reason, it wasn’t turned on yet; this trooper clearly wanted to draw out this fight. That was fine by Kanan; he was always down for a good brawl. Since those had become few and far between now that he wasn’t frequenting bars, Kanan didn’t want the skill to rust. He’d always jump at the opportunity to stay practiced.

As he traded blows with the stormtrooper, Kanan tried to keep an eye on the situation around him. The transport had started to move again, not yet at its full speed but out of range for them to truly attack it. He made a quick decision. Kanan shoved the stormtrooper as harder as he could and then ran after the slowly accelerating vehicle and pulled a tracker from his pocket. He breathed in and hoped this was going to work. He didn’t care what was on his side, luck or the Force, he just hoped something was. Kanan threw the tracker and watched it soar through the air. 

He let the breath out when it landed on the transport. By some miracle it actually worked out. 

Kanan whirled around and reassessed what was happening on the road. The troopers who had left Kanan were on the road, firing towards the ravine. Kanan could see Zeb now, wrestling with two troopers. He couldn’t place Hera yet and his attempt earned his the butt of a blaster to his face. Staggering back a few steps, he reoriented himself and made to tackle the stormtrooper he had been fighting. Once they were on the ground, he grabbed the helmeted head with both hands and then rammed it against the ground three times. They stilled beneath him and Kanan pushed himself up onto his feet again.

The two stormtroopers on the road had now turned and were aiming at him. 

“Stop!” one of the two shouted. And Kanan did, but only to use the time to plan his next move. 

He needed to get to Hera and Zeb. The transport was long gone now. They needed to escape and regroup, plan the next step. They needed to survive this. The troopers were starting make their way over and Kanan needed to think faster.

Hera and Zeb weren’t beaten yet; he could see that there was still fighting where they were. Kanan was confident he could take these two in front of him down easily. Take them down and get to the others and escape. It was doable.

But then a prickle on the back of his neck made Kanan look in the direction that the transport had disappeared to. He felt it coming before he heard all too familiar scream of a TIE fighter. He could see it cresting over the trees and pass overhead. Seconds later, the starfighter turned sharply and lined itself up with the road. The screech from it tore through the air towards the group before it opened fire. Kanan wasn’t given the chance to even react. The lasers struck the ground and the force of it threw him back just as he reached the road.

He didn’t move to get up off the ground for what felt like hours, though he knew it could only have been minutes. He waited and listened to the sound of the TIE making a second pass before it, too, disappeared out of range. Kanan took a moment to regroup before sitting upright. His head spun briefly before settling. A breeze had picked up, moving the moist air around him. Kanan welcomed it.

When nothing shot at him, he pushed himself back up onto his feet. Kanan inched his way over to the road despite being fairly confident he wasn’t in any danger anymore. He was right; there was no life anywhere; all the troopers that were left on the road were now dead. There were scorch marks on their armour and smoking rising from it showed just how painful and quick their deaths had been. A knot began to tie itself in his stomach. It had just been him and the stormtroopers on the road. The others were…

In a burst of energy, and carelessness, Kanan rushed over to where the rest of the fighting had been. He reached the flowers, now destroyed from the blaster fire, and the knot in his stomach either tightened beyond the point of ever releasing or disappeared in an instant. His ears were ringing, though that might have just being from the TIE attack. Kanan felt as though the world had been jerked out from under his feet. There were two troopers lying dead on the ground. That was all that Kanan found.

Hera and Zeb were nowhere to be seen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are happening guys. They're happening. I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I like writing Kanan's POV a lot and I'll be the first to admit I always let myself get carried away when doing so. 
> 
> Thank goodness my dear ol' pal Gwen edited this and made it less of a mess.


	4. Lost

Once Zeb was aware that he was awake and the planet hadn’t been destroyed, he was confident that the ground had thrown him a very long distance. And then maybe swallowed him up for good measure. He knew for certain that he hurt everywhere; maybe the planet had used him as a punching bag. He groaned and opened his eyes. All he could see were trees towering over him, the tan cloudy sky backdropping them. The sound of running water was nearby, though Zeb couldn’t place in what direction it was. Everything was hotter than he remembered it being. Everything seemed off. Maybe it was from the planet trying to kill him. 

With another groan, Zeb pushed himself upright and rubbed his head. He reached for his comlink as he looked around to get his bearings. “Spectres One and Two, do you copy?"

“ _zrrrrrrt_ …”

“Spectres, are you there?”

There was still no reply and Zeb’s head was starting to pound. Their comms were either being jammed or his comlink was broken. Both options were not what he wanted and neither was going to help him find Kanan and Hera.

He looked around again and then realized he had no idea where he was. The only familiar sight was his Bo-Rifle lying a few feet away from him, but everything else was foreign to him. Looking over his shoulder revealed a long and steep climb, which didn’t make any sense because they had placed themselves on the road and there wasn’t any hill to climb there. They had just walked along the road. A road he clearly wasn’t on anymore.

It was all missing. The road. The transport. Hera and Kanan. Something had obviously gone wrong but he couldn’t remember what yet. All he could think about in that moment was where Hera and Kanan were. He just wanted to find his friends.

Zeb moved to stand up, desperation compelling him, but one of his legs seemed to have a different idea. When he tried to put his weight on his right leg it gave out underneath him before he was even close to standing. He looked down at it and winced. There was a cut along his thigh, he couldn’t tell how bad it was but he could see that there was a fair amount of blood on his leg. He must have gotten when… when he fell.

He fell. He looked back at the hill, frowning. He was starting to remember what had happened.

He could remember the stormtroopers ambushing Hera and him. He remembered that they were starting to get the upper handed when the scream of a TIE ripped through the sound of their fighting. And then he remembered an explosion and the sensation of being thrown. Which explained where he was now. He—and, he hoped, Hera as well—had been thrown down into the ravine that the road ran parallel to. But Kanan hadn’t been with them. Kanan had been near the road, near the blasts from the TIE. He wouldn’t have been thrown with them. He had been in the middle of everything. Who knew where Kanan was now?

So Hera was the priority. Zeb needed to find her. In theory, she would be nearby, but even moving a short distance was going to prove difficult. Gingerly, he made his way to standing. He wobbled slightly once upright and then scanned the area around him. The terrain was much the same as it was at the top of the ravine, covered in the giant plants that could hold some of his weight. It would help Zeb steady himself a bit more than if he was just using his Bo-Rifle as he made his way around, but it also was what was hiding Hera from him, if she was here; if she was…

“Karabast,” he muttered, shaking the thought from his head. He was going to find Hera. Then they’d find Kanan. And then get off this planet and hopefully never do a job for Vizago again.

After picking up his weapon, he stumbled his way through the oddly shaped trees and overly large flowers, trying to find any trace of Hera. She shouldn’t have been thrown too far from him, but he had no way of knowing where she had landed. Zeb wondered for a moment how Kanan would have handled this; could he have tracked them down through the Force? Was he doing that right now? Zeb knew very little about what Kanan being a Jedi meant; really all he knew was that he was one, had been one. Zeb didn’t have the Force and wondering about it wasn’t going to find Hera.

Pushing forward, Zeb started climbing the hill to the left of where he had landed. If he moved on a diagonal, he could try and cover two of the possible directions Hera could be. He hoped luck was going to be on his side, that he would find her in this direction (he didn’t want to think about doubling back in his condition). Zeb often felt like luck wasn’t there from him, except for when it came to Hera and Kanan; he hoped that was going to continue.

Zeb had to stop every few meters when the pain in his leg went from throbbing to sharp. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed since he had woken up. It felt like an hour, but he knew the pain was clouding his senses; it could have easily been twenty minutes.

The third time he stopped, Zeb took the break to look around the landscape again. The plants were denser this far down into the ravine, which had been adding to the stress of his search. It was getting hard to move and see. The sun was beating down now more than ever; it was getting to midday now, which made it harder to focus in the heat. Everything added together was slowly chipping away at Zeb’s hope. But not his stubborn determination.

He took a shaky step forward, and another, and started his search up again. He got his momentum going again and trudged through the forest surrounding him, concealing everything. After a few more uneasy steps, Zeb noticed something out of place: a crushed flower. It was as if something had fallen across it.

His heart leapt in his chest as he staggered forward. As he got closer to the damaged plant, Zeb noticed others were also faring poorly. His chest was now tight with anticipation as he pushed his way along the path of mild destruction.

Finally, he reached the end of the path and there she was. Hera was lying on the ground—not moving, and clearly injured, but there. Zeb moved as quickly as he could to her side. He knelt beside her and felt a wave of relief when he saw her chest moving. She was alive. Battered and bruised just like he was, but very much alive. There was a cut along her forehead, just below her flight cap. Her jacket and her shirt underneath were burned through to reveal a cauterized wound on her left side, just below her rib cage.

“Hera,” he whispered, gently lifting her to rest her against his good leg. He needed to see to their wounds, but neither of them had one of the packs they had brought with them.

Zeb looked around, to see if perhaps one had been thrown and landed nearby. There wasn’t one to be found; he knew that had been a farfetched hope, but he did see a number of toppled-over trees a good distance away. They were leaning against each other, forming something that vaguely resembled a shelter, or at least he hoped it did. If there was an opening on the other side, it would at least hide them a bit more.

“Okay, Hera, I’m going to try and move us over there. It’ll hide us a bit better.”

Grunting from the pain, Zeb lifted Hera up and onto his left shoulder and stood. He swayed on the spot and he filled with worry that he wasn’t going to be able to move them. But he forced himself to find the strength to move. He started to make his way toward the trees, each step more painful than the last. It took longer to walk the short distance than Zeb would have liked, but at least there was no one here or awake to witness his struggle.

Once he reached the trees, and discovered it was in fact the shelter he wanted it to be, Zeb gently laid Hera down within it before collapsing next to her. He was exhausted. The rush of finding his captain was starting to fade and all he wanted was to lie down for a good few hours; days, even. But his leg was still bleeding, or had started up again; he hadn’t been paying it much attention. Hera’s forehead was also still bleeding and he knew her side needed to be looked at too.

“Zeb?” Hera’s voice, though soft and distant, cut through the air and refocused him. Zeb leaned forward and found that she had woken up. Her eyes didn’t hold their usual focus. She watched him, eyes half lidded. However, she didn’t seem lost or confused. She looked like she was still ready to take on the next challenge.

“Easy now, Hera,” Zeb said, resting a gentle hand on her shoulder when she tried to sit up. “We got banged up pretty good.”

“I can tell,” she replied, a small grin following her words. Zeb smiled in return and sat back with a sigh of relief; hurt as they were, they were going to be okay. He watched as she looked around the shelter as best she could. “Do we have our packs?”

He shook his head and breathed in deeply when it left him spinning.

“No,” Zeb managed to force out once everything settled down around him. “We’re going to have to figure something out.”

Hera nodded and winced slightly. A moment later, once she seemed to have recovered from the tiny amount of movement, she made to sit up again. Before Zeb could stop her, though, she started to shrug off her jacket.

“We’ll use this. It’s ruined as it is.” Once she had it off, Hera handed the jacket over to Zeb with a grim smile. Then, somewhat darkly, she added, “Though it’s in better shape than us.”

Zeb mimicked her expression and then began to rip apart the jacket. They sat in silence as he worked, questions they didn’t want to ask hanging in the air between them—questions he knew they’d eventually find out the answers to and answers they didn’t want to know yet. He wanted to stay in this world of the unknown, because in that moment, reality was definitely worse.

It was when he started to tie the makeshift bandage around Hera’s waist that she got the courage to grab hold of the question hanging over them. Or, at least she tried to.

“Is Kanan…? Did he…?”

“I don’t know. He was a lot closer to the blasts than us,” Zeb answered, choosing his words carefully. “I didn’t see him down here in the ravine. But that might just mean he’s still up at the road. Or he could be making his way to us now, looking for us. He’s… he’s a survivor, right? He’ll get here.”

Hera drew back sharply when Zeb tied off the bandage. He muttered an apology before shifting to deal with his leg. He worked faster on his own leg, not caring to be as gentle as he had been with her injury. When he was done, Zeb readjusted to face out of the shelter. She followed suit, gingerly moving next to him. Neither spoke for a while, both gently leaning into the other for support.

Despite the severity of their situation, Zeb found his thoughts beginning to wander. It was the first time since joining up that he had spent this much time alone with Hera. Truly alone. Kanan or Chopper would always join them, or they’d be surrounded by stormtroopers, or dealing with an employer. But now that he was alone with her, an opportunity he would normally be grateful to have, Zeb wished it were different. All he wanted was for Kanan to come and interrupt their solitary wait.

The sound of seven blaster shots being fired in the distance tore through the air. They both jumped, looking for the source, but it was over almost as quickly as it had started. Neither of them moved. Zeb tried to ignore the timing of those shots and his thoughts. _Kanan was okay. Kanan had to be okay._

Zeb reached over to take Hera’s hand and squeezed it. She looked up at him and tried to smile. When that failed, she went back to looking out of the shelter, her brows knitted together.

After they settled back into their anxious waiting, Zeb asked, “What went wrong? Our plan was solid; we knew roughly how many bucketheads we were supposed to be fighting. How did they get the jump on us?”

Hera didn’t answer right away.  Maybe she didn’t know. More likely, she was still struggling to piece it all together herself. It had been a good plan; Zeb couldn’t figure out where they somehow botched it.

“Fon Ta’em!” Hera blurted out, startling him. She was no longer leaning against him, sitting up as straight as she could, her entire body tense.

“Come again?”

“Fon Ta’em! He was the sleemo that gave Kanan and I our information, told us where to look for the schedule,” Hera explained, punching the ground next to her. She glared out past the shelter, as though her gaze would travel all the way back to Niango and this Fon Ta’em. “He must have taken our credits and then immediately called the Empire!”

“That would explain it,” Zeb grumbled. They should be used to being double crossed; it happened enough to everyone fighting the Empire. But it still always stung. He looked Hera over and sighed. “We need to rest.”

“I know.” He watched her shoulders slump down as she let some of the tension leave her body. She looked back him and smiled as she repeated, “I know.” 

They sat together under the odd trees of the planet, two injured people waiting for something to happen. They took turns dozing but neither slept for long. They didn’t know how long their wait for going to be; they didn’t know what was coming. Zeb hoped it would be Kanan, but he was going to prepare for whatever the galaxy was going to throw at them next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for waiting for this chapter! The holidays were crazy as they always are. I'm pretty confident that there won't be as long a break between chapters again. But who knows, the future is fun that way.
> 
> Thank you as always to my dearest friend, Gwen. This story would not be as good as it is without her. I'm learning a lot from her edits, she's helping me become a better writer. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy the chapter.


	5. And Found

Gorse was the last time Kanan had truly felt like he was utterly useless. He could still remember the cold emptiness that had eaten away at him as he had made his way through the crystal passages on Cynda, searching for the man who had become the closest thing to a father  he would ever have. He had been useless in stopping the Empire from killing Okadiah. When that man had died, Kanan was sure that he would never let anyone in again.

The first time Kanan had felt that was was when his life was destroyed, ripped from him before he had had the chance to live it. He would still wake up in the middle of some nights, a cold sweat covering him as he remembered the last time he saw his master. Watching Depa Billaba getting gunned down by the men… the  _ clones _ that were supposed to have protected them and fight alongside them. His master had told him to run and he had. He had, and she had died.

Despite all of that, despite his promise to himself never to open up again, Kanan had met Hera. He had met Zeb. He had met Chopper. He had opened up and let old wounds being to seal, no longer seeping out and coating him in despair. Kanan was alive again. Fighting again. Loving again.

But now that feeling of emptiness and uselessness was back, creeping slowly through his entire body as he stood over the ruined flowers, dead stormtroopers lying around him as if to remind him of the Empire’s hand in his life. He wanted to start running. To go find Hera and Zeb, or maybe to finish the job first. But another part of him wanted to run away from here and never look back, he knew he could still manage at least that.

But he couldn’t move. Kanan was rooted in place feeling the weight of his failure to his friends bear down on him. He hadn’t been able to save them, to stop the Empire from taking them away from him just like it had everything else. It was all happening again.

All because he couldn’t be the Jedi he should be. All because he wouldn’t.

And that was why he had been alone all those years leading up to Gorse. He was trying to ignore the voice inside him saying that he should have stayed alone, the voice that had been whispering ever since he stepped onto the  _ Ghost _ . But it was right. It always was. Death followed Kanan wherever he went, consuming everything that he dared to love.

_ You don’t know that Hera and Zeb are dead. _

But he didn’t know if they were alive and that terrified him.

Kanan looked back at the road again before pulling out his comlink. He tried to contact Hera’s, but was met with static. He tried again before frowning. Hoping hers was just turned off, he then tried Zeb’s and was met with the same results. Kanan had to resist the urge to throw the device off into the ravine. He rubbed his temples with one hand after a moment, and then commed the final member of their team.

“Chopper.”

He was given a response almost immediately. It was clear that Chopper had been waiting for contact almost too eagerly and was just as unhelpful as Kanan predicted the droid would be.

“Since when did you care about protocol,  _ Spectre Three _ ?” Kanan asked, shutting his eyes as he spoke. Just once it would have been nice if Chopper didn’t pick a fight with him for the sake of it. Chopper threw a string of loud whistles and bleats through the comm. He wasn’t having Kanan’s attitude, and that feeling was mutual. “Chop, listen. The plan went south. I need your help.”

There was a moment of silence before Chopper asked what he could do. Kanan had to give him that, at least; no matter how frustrating and resistant he was, Chopper would get the job done.

“I got a tracker on the transport but I can’t go after it right now. The  _ Ghost _ should be able to see where and when it stops. Is it tracking it?” he asked. He brushed off Chopper’s offhand comment that he should have been sure the equipment worked before using it and waited for the confirmation that it was. Once received, Kanan said, “Okay, send me the coordinates once you’ve got them. And Chopper, just stay where you are for now. I’ll try to get this job back on track.”

“ _ Whump wuh waaaha? _ ” The question hit him hard.  _ Where was Hera? _ He has hoped this wouldn’t have come up, but of course Chopper noticed he was making the call, not Hera.

He swallowed and tried to think of what to say. He needed to answer fast to avoid suspicion but he needed to be sure his answer was convincing. “Hera’s just fine, Chop. We’ve gotten separated but I know where she is,” he lied. The words came out more easily than he would have liked, but lying was easy after all the years of having been on the run. He could justify it for now; he needed Chopper to focus. He could feel guilty about this later. “Now get to work.”

He heard a final indignant sound from the comlink before the only noises left around him were from Felucia. 

Kanan studied the scene around him, looking for a clue as to where to go from here. The road was completely wrecked; the smoke was still rising. It was clear the blast from the TIE fighter had thrown those near it, killing anyone too close to the lasers. Zeb and Hera had been close to the road, but not too close. They must have been thrown, like he had been. Thrown into the ravine.

Rubbing the back of his neck, he walked to the edge of the ravine. It was a deep. He couldn’t make out the bottom through all the oversized plants and the drop down. He hoped the plants helped with their fall because otherwise Kanan was sure he wasn’t going to like what he found. 

He frowned, looking around again. There had to be something. And, for once, luck was on his side. As he did the final look around, Kanan made two discoveries—both helpful though one was unwelcome. The first was Hera’s pack, which was still next to the ruined flowers. He picked it up with a tight smile. The contents of the bag were fine, he at least would be able to continue with the job if…

The other find, the one that left a bad feeling prickling in his mind was the body count on the road. There were only seven stormtrooper bodies despite there having been nine once the ambush took place. Two were missing now. He swore under his breath as he started pacing along the ledge. If his luck hadn't started to run out, which was unlikely, they were killed in the blast but fell into the ravine. Shaking his head, he looked down the harsh slope at his feet. He knew the troopers were probably alive and were going to start looking for him and the others, if they weren’t already doing that. He needed to get down there now.

The initial climb down was harder than Kanan had predicted it being, but it still didn’t prove to be much of a challenge. The large trees helped him steady himself but he knew it was the years of training and the Force, no matter how much he distanced himself from it, were what was getting him down into the ravine without hurting himself. The slope into the ravine decreased in severity about halfway down, giving him the chance to move his focus entirely to searching for Hera and Zeb. And hope that he'd avoid running into the two stormtroopers.

It was a half hour into his search, and with still no trace of his friends, that Kanan stopped to reevaluate the situation. Blindly searching was getting him nowhere. He had no way of knowing which direction they were thrown. He didn’t even know if they were together when they landed. Dread was seeping back into him; while he had been climbing down it was easy to ignore but now that he was stationary it was back in full force. There was nothing to guide him down here.

“ _ Whump whump wah whump. _ ” Chopper’s voice burst out from the comm, making Kanan jump.

“Great, Spectre Three,” Kanan replied, running his hand over the top of his hair. “Send it my way, to Hera’s datapad.”

“ _ Wa- Whuump wah, _ ” Chopper confirmed the information being sent, though Kanan caught the brief stammer. Sending it to Hera’s datapad shouldn’t have been a red flag, but considering how tight lipped Kanan was being about her whereabouts, he must have been putting together just how bad things had gone. Kanan was going to owe him a lot once this was all over.

“Thanks,” he said before hooking the comlink back to his belt. He heard the ping of the datapad receiving the coordinates and a brief smile passed over his face. Yes, even if everything else ended up ruined, he would be able to finish the job, get paid, and go back on the run. Shaking the thought from his head and adjusting the straps of Hera’s pack, he set off on his search again.

Another ten minutes of aimless wandering passed before Kanan found any sign of what had happened up on the road down here in the ravine. He heard the mechanized voices that really should have sent chills through his body. He made his way through the plants until he was able to see and hear the stormtroopers clearly.

“—a bag,” one of the troopers said. Kanan peered around the tree serving as his cover to see what they were referring to. One of the troopers kicked a large bag on the ground and Kanan grinned. It was Zeb’s.

“Should we take it in?” the second trooper asked. He was turning around, searching the ravine of any sign of the owner.

Kanan slipped out from behind the tree and crept forward, blaster drawn and ready. If he could get close enough, he could take them out before they knew what hit them. He wasn’t going to risk shooting from this far away. While his aim was better than good, and being outnumbered by stormtroopers never stopped him before, he didn’t want to risk missing a shot and giving them that chance to recover from the mistake.

“No. We need to find those two criminals and confirm their deaths,” the first said, giving the bag another kick. Kanan was only a few meters away now and realized that it had been a mistake to leave his cover. One wrong move and he'd be reminded just how painful blaster bolts could be. “Then we head back to base. We aren’t here to loot garbage.”

“Fair enough,” they responded. There was a final kick to the bag before they both turned to begin their search again. They were moving away from him. He followed after them, trying to keep the distance the same. It was going well until Kanan's foot landed on a loose stone, sending him tumbling forward. And not quietly. “What the…?”

Both stormtroopers turned, raising their blasters, and found Kanan trying to get his balance back.

“Oh, wonderful,” he said through gritted teeth. He raised his blaster and skipped aiming as he fired three shots towards the white armoured bodies. One landed square in the chest of one stormtrooper, sending them to the ground. The other two bolts were completely off any possible mark.

The still standing trooper aimed and fired two shoots at Kanan, who dived and rolled out of the line of fire. He came out of the roll and fired twice in quick secession. Both made contact and sent the stormtrooper down.

Kanan, on one knee, breathed deeply and tried to regain a sense of control over himself. His whole body felt ignited by energy all around him. It was an all too familiar feeling from a life he tried to keep in his past. All from opening himself up and allowing the Force to guide his hand. It hadn’t been a conscious choice, it never was these days. It was always a knee jerk reaction in the moment. Despite his active lack for effort to connect, it seemed the Force had a different idea for him. Whenever it forced its way into him, through him, Kanan was left rattled. This time was no different.

He stood up slowly, holstering his blaster. Kanan walked over to the pack lying on the ground and picked it up. Both straps went over one shoulder and then he began his search again. He needed to focus on Hera and Zeb. He could try and deal, and fail, with his constant struggle of trying to try and push the Force out of him. But there was no point in trying right now.

About ten feet away from his fight, Kanan found another clue to his friends’ whereabouts: a large trail of recently crushed flowers. The wreckage was too large to be created by a human. There was some blood on the floors but not enough to make him start to panic. Finally, his fortune was starting to look up. It had to have been Zeb who landed here. Which meant he wasn't hurt to severely to move. 

Zeb was alive, hurt but definitely alive.

After a final look over of the area, Kanan took off running. He was following what he hoped was a path that Zeb had created. It brought him back up the slope of the ravine until he reached another grouping of crushed flowers and plants. Empty, just like the last one. His stomach tightened with hope. Zeb had to have found Hera. They were alive and together.

Kanan looked around, trying to figure out where they could have gone from here. Shelter. They would have tried to find shelter. Zeb was injured, Hera probably was too. They couldn’t have gone that far. He felt his heartbeat starting to speed up. He was so close. Then, he spotted a grouping of trees, all leaning on each other, hiding whatever was on the other side. There. That’s where they would have gone.

Rushing, he ran down the slope to what he needed to be his friends' makeshift shelter. He slowed down when he reached the back and took careful steps around it; he didn’t want to startle them and get shot. Anticipation rose within in as he stepped around to the opening.

And there they were. Zeb and Hera were leaning against each other, neither seemed to be fully awake. Alive. Both of them breathing. Both of them in front of him. Kanan smiled and crouched down in front of the pair. He place a hand on Zeb’s shoulder and said, “You guys aren’t very good at keeping watch.”

Zeb jerked up, a snarl coming up out of his throat but died almost immediately. “Kanan!” he shouted, pulling the almost asleep Hera back into full consciousness. “You’re alive!”

“I could say the same about you two,” Kanan said. Relief was washing over him and he felt himself land hard against the ground. His legs had given out beneath him. Hera’s eyes were bright as she looked him over, a smile spreading over her face as well. They were alive. They were all alive. He took his turn to look them over and grimaced at what he saw. Zeb’s right leg had what looked to be a part of Hera’s jacket tied around it, a dark spot spread across the centre. Hera had a dried cut across her forehead and another makeshift bandage from her jacket around her waist. “Let me get the medpac out.”

“Good idea,” Zeb said, his voice rough from exhaustion and pain.

“Are you okay?” Hera asked, reaching over to him and brushed her hand against his leg. She was still looking him over, her eyes still warm. Kanan fumbled through the packs in search of the medpac to avoid her gaze, even if he could still feel it on him. Was he okay? Of course he wasn’t. He had almost given up. Again. He had almost lost everything he loved. Again.

“I’m fine, Hera,” he answered, pulling out the medpac with a smile now back on his face. “It takes more than a TIE fighter to keep me down.”

With Hera’s insisting, Kanan dealt with Zeb’s leg first, which was a good call. With a bacta patch placed on the wound and the agreement that they’d stay in the shelter well into to the night, Zeb laid down to sleep. He was out by the time Kanan was ready to start working on Hera’s injuries.

“I got lucky,” she said as she untied the piece of her ruined jacket. She then tried to reach for her shirt’s zipper and winced. Kanan took over, unzipping it as she spoke. “That’s one of the plus sides to blaster wounds, they can get cauterized. Less of a mess.”

“Right,” Kanan muttered. “Lucky.” She glared at him over her shoulder. He ignored her look and pulled her shirt off—it was hanging off her arms as she held it away from her body—getting to work bandaging her ‘lucky’ wound. He took his time even though he wanted the cover up the injury as quickly as possible. Seeing them on her, on Zeb, filled him with guilt. 

He felt Hera’s gaze burning into him again as he cleaned up. He sighed as he helped her get her shirt back on and zipped up. He sat down next to her, looking at her finally. “What?”

“I’m grateful you found us, I really am. I don’t want to think about what would have happened to Zeb’s leg if you hadn’t it,” Hera said. She sighed in turn and looked out of the shelter. “But I won’t lie, there is a part of me that’s annoyed this job failed. We really needed the credits.”

It took a lot of strength to stay calm. Kanan never liked being annoyed, or for that matter angry, with Hera. It left him feeling dried up, empty. It took a great deal to get him there. But every now and then she could find a way to push him in that direction. And it was almost always when she put her work before her safety. It was something they hadn’t yet seen eye to eye on. Kanan would gladly drop their job or mission or whatever Hera called it that day to save her, while she was clear that the mission needed to come first. He wasn’t sure that they’d ever agree on the matter. 

He took a deep breath in and let it out. After another, choosing his words carefully, he said, “I didn’t abandon the mission, Hera. I got a tracker onto the transport and I had Chopper track it from the  _ Ghost _ . I know where the Imperial base is. We can, if you insist  _ and _ if you and Zeb are able to, try to hit the base tonight.”

Hera smiled up at him for a second but it wavered once they made eye contact.  “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Sometimes he hated how well she could read him. It wasn’t surprising anymore, they had been working and living together for four years. She knew him inside and out, which ruined all of his attempts of stoicism with her.

Instead of answering, Kanan half turned and rested his forehead against her shoulder, his hand reaching up to grasp the other one. Hera’s hands lifted and rested on the back of his head, a thumb gently dragging over his hair. It was almost comical that she was comforting him, all patched up from having been literally tossed around by the Empire. But it only confirmed what he had already knew: Hera had always been the stronger of the two of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jedi playing at being space detectives is one of my all time favourite things. As well as anytime someone Force sensitive is like "oh yeah this is hard but lol whatever I have the Force" and just does the difficult thing.
> 
> Thank you to Gwen for all the help she's given me throughout this fic. I've learned a lot. 
> 
> My plan, and we'll see how I do, is to try and get the next four chapters out before season 4 comes back.


	6. Pretend

A sharp and sudden pain wrenched Hera out of dreamless sleep. She sat upright. She was woken up when she had turned onto her side and trapped her arm against the wound. She blinked a few times, trying to focus on where she was instead of the pain. Everything felt a little disjointed, but Hera knew that was from the fight and fall. She touched her side and winced slightly. While the bacta patch on it was doing its work, it wasn't healing as fast as she’d like it to. She was ready to get back on her ship and rest and pretend she had nothing to do. She was definitely ready for this job to be over.

Looking around the shelter, she found that Zeb was now leaning against one of the trees, having moved since she had gone to sleep. She watched him long enough to decide he had drifted off to sleep again, which she really should have been trying to do as well.

But, she didn’t move to lie down again. Now that she was awake, her mind started going over everything that had happened and what they still needed to do. The start of this job was a complete disaster. She hated that her confidence had almost lost them the job. They came into it too cocky. If they did manage to pull this off, she was going to make sure this Vizago character didn’t find out just had badly they had messed up. She didn’t want to succeed and then lose any chance of having a new employer.

Hera rubbed her eyes, grateful she had taken her gloves off. She looked around the shelter and frowned. She was embarrassed. She was better than this.

With a glance at Zeb, Hera let out a huff. How had she almost gotten her teammates hurt? While Kanan was physically fine, Zeb could have been seriously injured and it would have been all her fault. They both trusted her to know what she’s doing and to make sure they weren't going to be doing anything that would end up with getting them killed. Hera knew she had let the ball drop. Next time, she was going to actually go in prepared. She wasn’t going to just rely on the fact that they were good at what they do. Hera needed to be better than that, better for her crew.

Gingerly, as to not strain her side even more, Hera crawled her way out of the shelter and stood up. She resisted stretching her arms up, knowing she'd only regret it immediately. She stood at the mouth of the shelter and looked out at the ravine surrounding them. It was getting late in the day now. Though she couldn’t see the sun from where they were in the ravine, it had started to set. The plants had begun to glow, faint still but nonetheless starting to wash everything in faint blue and gold lights. Soon the three of them were going to have to finalize their plan and head out to the base. Hera knew that she really should be trying to get more rest.

Movement to her left drew her eye. Kanan was sitting with his back to the shelter, leaning back on his hands and legs kicked out in front of him. She couldn’t see his face but she had a strong feeling he had been awake this whole time. Shaking her head, Hera made her way over to him. Gently, she rested a hand on his shoulder making him to jump. He looked up at her and a forced smile tugged at his lips.

“You should still be sleeping,” he said.

“You need to rest, too,” she offered as a response. Hera knew he was worried about her and Zeb, but it annoyed her when he wouldn't even try to take care of himself. “Go get some, I can be on watch until we head out.”

Kanan shook his head and crossed his legs as if to prove he wasn’t going to move. With a sigh, and immediate help from Kanan, Hera settled down on his right. For a moment she thought she’d try to not lean on him, to show she didn’t need his help anymore, but instead let that petty idea go; she wasn’t going to tire herself out to prove to Kanan he was being ridiculous. She had some idea as to why he was being this way. But that didn’t stop her from being annoyed.

So, she leaned against him, her shoulder pressing lightly into his chest. Hera felt him sink an inch as he adjusted to her weight, his hand moving to rest on the ground right at her tailbone. She knew he was ready to accept her, he always was.

It was a few minutes silence before she grew tired of them just sitting together. “You know I’m going to be fine, right?” she asked, turning to look up at his face. Kanan kept his gaze forward, though she caught his eyes flicker down at her. “Zeb, too. We’ve been through worse.”

Kanan’s arm moved from behind her to rest on her left hip, pulling her closer against him. It was gentle, far gentler than it normally would have been when they sat like this. He was being careful with her, which often rubbed her the wrong way when he tried it. It still did now, but if she was being honest she had to admit that she was grateful he remembered where her injury was. Hera didn’t want to flinch and make him even more of a pain to deal with.

He hadn’t answered yet. His silence weighed down on her, picking at her nerves. “Kanan, what’s wrong?”

“I’ve never been to Devaron,” he said. Kanan wasn’t meeting her eyes still. Hera raised a brow and made to respond but he continued talking. “I just realized that. Have you been there?”

Hera rolled her eyes and shook her head.

“There are a lot of places out there. This is my first time on Felucia, too. I thought I had seen so much of the galaxy by the time I had met you, but there’s always another planet,” Kanan continued. His thumb started to rub small circles on her hip. She sighed and rested her head against his shoulder, flicking her lekku over his shoulder and arm. One of her hands moved to rest on his right knee. “There’s a lot more out there for us to see.”

“I hate to break it to you, Kanan, but we’re not really the best group of people to go sightseeing around the galaxy,” Hera replied.

“Well, we can make a requirement that whatever jobs we take on has to put us on a new planet,” he said. Hera chuckled and shook her head again, her lekku rubbing gently across Kanan’s arm which sent tingles over her skin. “No repeats.”

“I think that will just lead to different problems,” she said. She was smiling now. Hera knew Kanan was trying to be charming to avoid talking about what was eating at him but sometimes he really  _ could _ be charming. “It would definitely limit our income if we can only land on a planet once.”

“Blast,” Kanan said as he snapped his fingers. He twisted around so he could finally get a good look at her, a wide grin brightening up his face. “You think of everything.”

Hera shrugged and said, “I’m good at that. Comes with being the leader.”

“I thought I was the leader, ‘Spectre Two’,” he drawled.

“That’s just what we tell the Imperials, dear,” Hera said. She reached up and patted his cheek. “You know I’m in charge.”

“Yeah.” His voice came out deeper with the word before he leaned down and captured her lips with his.

Hera pulled back immediately and eyed him. “Kanan,” she said, “this really isn’t the time.”

“It’s just kissing,” he replied, though he didn’t make a move for her again.

She knew that she really shouldn’t encourage him whenever he got like this. After all their years together, all that time, Hera was very aware of when Kanan didn’t want to talk and what he’d do to avoid it. She’d seen him try to charm, to woo, to irritate, to argue, as well as any other variety of tactics to avoid a conversation he should be having. She had seen it all and had dealt with his attitude every time. They always found a way through it, together. Hera knew she should really try and get him to open up now.

But kissing him was nice.

And she was tired. She wanted a moment where she could pretend that they weren’t always on the run. She wanted to pretend she wasn’t fighting to free a galaxy from tyranny. Hera wanted a moment with just Kanan.

Her hand moved back to his cheek and she watched his eyebrows rise as she drew his mouth back to hers. He didn’t hesitate at all, matching her intent immediately. He pulled her even closer, though his hand moved carefully up her side and then onto her back. Hera laughed into the kiss at the juxtaposition of his hand and his intentions. Kanan smiled in response.

Then the kiss depended. She gasped against his mouth as his tongue slipped into her mouth. Her hand on his cheek moved to the back of his head and pulled him closer. He eagerly followed her unspoken order. His left hand moved to the back of her head and up to her right lek, then down it to its tip. Hera shivered as he repeated the motion on the other lek.

Her side was starting to ache but Hera had no thought of stopping. That would defeat the purpose of this farce of escaping. She poured herself into him. She would give Kanan in this moment what he longed for from her every day, she always did when she reached out to him like this. They both knew this was just another brief meeting for them. She knew that this should be the last time. She ignored the voice that reminded her that there had now been multiple ‘last times’.

Her breath was starting to leave her as they went on. If the loss of air was because of Kanan or from the injury on her side, or both, she didn’t care. Hera wasn’t trying to figure out why any of this was happening; all she knew was that she wanted it to be happening. Hera was happy to pretend that all that mattered was that she was being held in the arms of the man she—

Hera noticed Kanan’s hands had begun to wander across her body with building intent. His right hand had moved from her lekku to grasp her thigh and gave it a tug towards him, a clear invitation to climb onto his lap. An invitation she accepted freely. Her leg followed his pull and moved across him as she started to lift herself over him. As she straddled him and started to sink down, Hera felt what his left hand had ended up. She hadn’t realized it moved from her neck until the zipper of her shirt was slowly being drawn down. She could feel the warm and moist air of Felucia latching onto her newly exposed skin.

“Kanan,” she breathed, breaking from the kiss. He didn’t seem to mind the loss of her lips against his and moved his mouth to her neck, now easy to get at with the zipper still moving down her back. Kanan hummed against her skin, pulling a small laugh from her. His right hand went to the small of her back and pulled her up against him.

“What’s gotten into you?” she asked, moving to try and see his face.

Ignoring her question, Kanan kept the zipper on its descent and his mouth was working its way back up to her face, peppering kisses along the path. Hera placed her hands to his shoulders and gave a firm shove. “Kanan, stop,” she said, any lightness in her voice gone.

She sat further back on his lap so that she was no longer pressed against his chest. The distance between them left her longing for the contact again. His hands were frozen in place on her body, she could still feel the heat from them seeping through her clothes, trying to distract her. She pushed her desires down, giving into them even briefly had allowed them to go too far. Hera knew better, they both did. 

Hera looked him over, searching to see that he was with her. But confusion was what met her. Kanan’s face was flushed, his brows furrowed. His breath was as short and shallow as hers. He looked back at her with the same intense searching. It was as though he had no idea why she would want to stop him, seemingly unaware that he was moving into grounds that were entirely inappropriate for where they were. He seemed lost, his compass pulled out of his hand and he was left to wander aimlessly. Then he blinked and he was there with her. Finally, Kanan realized what was happening.

“Sorry,” he muttered. He brushed his lips against her cheek, chaste compared to his actions mere seconds ago, and zipped her shirt back up. She placed a hand on his face and started to brush her thumb against him, but Kanan moved her off of him. Her leg slid slowly over him as he did so, leaving a faint tingle along her calf as it travelled across. Her gaze followed his face as he stood up. There was still pain and confusion there, and Hera thought she also saw regret. She opened her mouth but he cut her off, “We should probably go wake Zeb. I think it’s time to head out soon.”

Hera nodded and took the hand he offered her. He helped her onto her feet, bringing their bodies in close again before Kanan quickly took a step back, avoiding her gaze. Hera squeezed his hand, encouraging him to open up to her. “You can talk to me,” she said softly, offering what she hoped he needed from her.

He nodded before dropping her hand. “Come on,” Kanan said and led her towards their still sleeping teammate.

She watched him walk away for a moment before slowly following after him. There was a knot in her stomach that tightened with each step. Hera needed to focus but each of Kanan’s movements kept snatching at her attention. Frustration coursed through her. She knew that there was an easy fix to some of this mess: don’t be romantically involved and they neither of you can get carried away. Each day that went by reminded Hera that she had made a decision and repeatedly ignored it.

Except, this time, Hera didn’t think the problem was their private lives, nor the romance that tried to fill it. There was something bothering Kanan and he was just using their relationship as a distraction. Hera hated it when Kanan pushed her away like this. It kept her off kilter. She hated when these moods got hold of him.

Despite her frustrations, Hera let him help her to sitting and tried to hide her frown when Kanan settled down far from her. If Zeb noticed any tension, he was graciously ignoring it.

They talked through their plan to take the base, which was much more haphazard than the original one, and really wasn’t much of a plan at all. But since the original plan had failed spectacularly, Hera wasn’t going to fret too much over the rushed planning for this second attempt. Once they were all as comfortable with the details as they could be, they packed up any signs of their brief stay and headed out into the ever-darkening night.

Hera looked Kanan over as they began the trek out of the ravine. For now, she was going to have to put away her thoughts on Kanan aside. Focusing on them would get her killed during a fight. There would be time later to figure out what he was fretting over and time for her to fret over what they were together. Hera needed to focus on the mission. She needed to be the leader. And she would.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Make outs. Finally. For a story tagged as Kanan/Hera, there has not been enough making out in it. And this is the fun kind of make out: ill-timed make outs. 
> 
> The next chapter will be up on Saturday.


	7. Breaking In

The Imperial base was underwhelming from the moment they got there. And, the longer they watched it under the harsh, artificial lights, the less impressive it got.

The Felucian night had settled over the group completely. It had taken them a few hours to trek out of the ravine and along to the road to reach the base. They discovered just how useful the plants of Felucia were, allowing them to use the natural lights from them instead of pulling out flashlights. Though, Zeb was starting to think that maybe they would have been fine using flashlights with this group from the Empire. While this group had managed to actually get the jump on them once, it didn't seem likely that it could happen again. 

Kanan had found a cluster of plants for them to hide behind and watch the front of the base from. There was no large wall, not even a fence for that matter, around the perimeter to keep any unwanted visitors out. There were only two stormtroopers on patrol around the base. After having watched them make one loop, Zeb could tell they seemed bored. With a clear view of the mediocre sized building, it was a wonder that this base was still here with minimal protection and locals who weren’t thrilled about the Imperial presence. 

But, then again, fear was a powerful tool, one that the Empire was well stocked in. Tell the people of Felucia that their homes will be burned like on countless other planets and watch the people become pacified.

Despite knowing that, Zeb was pretty sure this had to be some kind of mistake. This couldn’t be something built by that all-powerful Empire; this was just lazy. How could this have been the group of Imperials that had actually managed to pull one over on them?

“Are we supposed to be intimidated?” Zeb grumbled his question, shooting a glance at Hera. She smiled back at him—it was almost sympathetic.

“Don’t be mean, Zeb,” Kanan said, lowering his macrobinoculars. “Just because the Empire has unlimited resources doesn’t mean you can expect them to actually do something effective with it all.”

Zeb chuckled in response before looking at the base again. There was a definite lack of resources. They could see everything in the base. It was well lit across the grounds, tall lights towers placed around the edges. Everything had a harsh light over it. The natural glow from the Felucian planets was completely overpowered. In the hangar he could count four TIE fighters sitting in wait but there wasn’t much else in the was of defence. There were only a couple of ground turrets, each at the far corners from the hangar. Two troop transports and what looked like only a handful of stormtroopers were littered outside.

“This might actually be doable,” Kanan said as he raised the binoculars back to his eyes. “I think I can lead us into the hangar, we’ll just have to avoid being seen by anyone. Easy.”

“Right,” Zeb said. “And hope we aren’t walking into another trap.”

Kanan flashed a grin at him. “Eh, we’re bound to get lucky at some point. Let’s go.”

He watched as Kanan started to lead them towards the base. “I know I’ve asked before, but honestly, Hera, where did you find him?” He muttered to Hera. She smirked at him as they followed.

The two of them were led through the plants until they reached the edge of the clearing the base was in. Crouching, they waited for Kanan to make his first move. He seemed to be waiting for the two patrolling guards to make their way over. Minutes passed as the troopers drew closer and closer to ambush site. Kanan threw a quick glance at Zeb, raising an eyebrow. Zeb grinned in response to the unasked question and cracked his knuckles.

Once the stormtroopers were only a few meters away, and hidden from view of the rest of the base behind a turret, Kanan and Zeb leaped at the two unprepared guards. Neither trooper had a chance to put up a fight, both knocked out before they knew what hit them. After dragging the bodies into the surrounding forest, the three made their way onto the base.

It was getting more and more ridiculous to Zeb the further they got onto the base, there were so few stormtroopers about. While there was the handful walking around, they all carried the same air of boredom with them. Zeb wasn’t worried about being spot. Not by this group.

When they were about halfway to the hangar, Kanan stopped them behind one of the troop transports to reassess their plan. They were all bent over slightly to ensure they wouldn’t be seen. Zeb was watching the path they had taken, just in case their trail got picked up. 

“It’ll be pretty straightforward from here. Hera, you and Zeb should go in ahead, keep moving along the edges, and I’ll—“

“No!” Hera cut him off. The word was barely a whisper.

Zeb looked over his shoulder, surprised by the outburst. They were both normally comfortable with Kanan taking the lead on ground missions like this; Hera would rarely intervene while they were working (though Zeb was very aware of the occasional fights the two younger adults would have once they were all back on the ship, alive).

“You don’t even know what I was going to say,” Kanan said, his voice hushed like hers. He frowned and looked up at Zeb. “At least let me pitch the idea, Hera.”

“I know exactly where you were going,” she retorted. “You’re going to suggest that Zeb and I go ahead while you cover us or distract the guards or do something else foolish and reckless on your own. So, no, we’re not doing that.”

“It’s a good idea, Hera. I’m in the best shape, I can keep the bucketheads out of your way,” he argued, gesturing at the two in front of him.

“Sorry, Kanan,” Zeb said. He took a couple steps closer so he could talk in a more hushed tone. “I’m with Hera on this one, splitting up doesn’t sound too great. What if we’re attacked and you’re cut off from us?”

“Guys…”

“Kanan, we all almost lost each other once this mission. I’m not risking that again,” she said, gripping his right arm. He glanced down and after a beat, nodded. “Thank you.”

“You know what would be nice?” Zeb asked. Kanan and Hera looked over at him. “Explosives. If we had a ton of explosives to use. Handy in a fight.”

“Or as a distraction,” Kanan supplied, a forced smile appearing of his face.

“Hera, can we have explosives for the next mission?”

Hera rolled her eyes and pointed to the hangar. Zeb flashed a grin at Kanan and lifted his Bo-Rifle up. Kanan then inched his way over to the end of the transport. Hera followed in second, Zeb keeping up the rear.

His leg was starting to ache again, but it wasn’t at the point that Zeb wouldn’t be able to fight. He hoped they would wrap this up quickly enough, even if he was itching for a little payback for how the day had turned out.

They stopped again outside the hangar, each of them leaning against the outside wall. Hera lifted her comm as Zeb and Kanan kept watch on the unobservant stormtroopers around. “Spectre Three, it’s Spectre One. We need to you come to the base now. Slowly. Don’t draw attention to the  _ Ghost _ and don’t you dare get shot at. We’ll have the supplies ready.”

What Zeb assumed was a short confirmation from the droid blared through the comm, making all three of them to cringe. They stayed where they were but it quickly became clear they hadn’t been heard. Kanan gave a quick nod and turned to make his way into the hangar.

Zeb waited until both Kanan and Hera disappeared into the large building and then moved in after them. He backed into the hangar and watching the outside for a handful of seconds before jogging to go join them at a stack of crates.

“This is good,” Hera muttered to herself as she looked into one of the crates. “It’s all here, the med supplies, rations, weapons.”

“That’s a lot of weapons,” Zeb said, grimacing. The other two nodded in agreement. Hera had the lids off of three crates, each respectively containing E-11 blaster rifles, SE-14r light repeating blasters, and frag grenades.

“Two more crates of weapons over here,” Kanan said, pointing to the pair in front of him. “Good to get out of the Empire’s hands, at least.”

“Feel a lot more comfortable if they were in no one’s hands,” Zeb replied, shrugging as he did.

“Well, this might cheer you up a bit, Zeb,” Hera said, smiling up at him. She pointed to the left of the stack of crates. “Shield generators. We can do a lot of good with those.”

Kanan whistled softly. “And Vizago didn’t mention those being a part of the haul.”

“Which means they’re ours. We can make a solid profit off of those,” Zeb said with a widening grin.

Hera murmured something in response, but it was clear her thoughts were now elsewhere. Zeb could see her planning out exactly where each crate and shield generator was going. He had a feeling this bonus find was not going to line their pockets with more credits. While Fulcrum was a name he had only heard in passing the times when Hera gave them jobs that felt a little more for freedom fighters, there was a no doubt in his mind that these shield generators were going to the mysterious contact.

With the inspection of the crates finished, Zeb and Kanan began to move them, one or two at a time, towards the hangar entrance. Hera stayed with the larger stack, keeping guard in case the Empire decided it was time to do their job. As they worked, and as each lap moved the crates from one pile to the new one, Zeb was getting worried that the moment they’d be caught was coming. Chopper still hadn’t arrived with the  _ Ghost _ . They were pushing the luck Kanan was so sure they had this time.

“Last two,” Hera said as Zeb trotted back over. He nodded, turning the repulsors for the larger of the two crates on. They made their way over to Kanan who was scanning the outside of the base.

“Chopper isn’t here yet,” Kanan said, the edge in his voice evident.

“He will be,” Hera said firmly.

“Yeah, but now would be better.”

“Freeze!”

Zeb groaned before he could stop himself. They all slowly turned to see six stormtroopers standing in a semicircle with their blasters raised.

“What was that about us being lucky this time, Kanan?” Zeb asked.

“Well, I was trying to be optimistic for you, pal,” he answered, shrugging.

“Hands in the air, pirate scum!” Zeb figured it was the trooper with the orange pauldron who had given them the order. None of them moved, staring out at the potential firing squad. “I said, hands in the air!”

“Yeah, but you led with ‘freeze’,” Kanan said. Hera hissed his name as Zeb stifled a snort of laughter. “We’re only simple criminals, you’re going to have to be patient with us.”

They heard the blaster go off before the bolt hit the ground in front of their feet. Zeb jumped back and hit their newly, and maybe only briefly, acquired pile of crates.

“Hands in the air. Now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re getting there! Thank you everyone for being patient with the least consistent posting schedule. Two more chapters left: chapter 8 will be out on Tuesday and chapter 9 will be out on Friday.


	8. Flight

“Hands in the air. Now.”

Hera was about ready to kick herself. The whole had become a complete disaster. Why hadn’t she just order them all back to the  _ Ghost _ and leave? Sure, they needed the credits, but Vizago wasn’t the only lowlife in the galaxy. They could have found work in any other sector. What had compelled her to keep at this job?

Neither she nor the two with her were making any move to put their hands in the air. It really didn’t matter if they complied with these stormtroopers or not; they were most likely going to be shot either way.

The six Imperials took a half step forward and Hera gave in, starting to raise her hands. Maybe if they tried to play along it would by them the time to figure a way out of here. Or Chopper would get here. Anything they could do to prolong their not dying.

“Hey, Spectre Two?” Zeb asked. He was still leaning against the crates, having landed there after the one trooper’s warning shots.

“Yes?” she responded, the word barely getting out of her mouth.  Her hands hovered in the air by her chest, frozen in place. She didn’t look over at him, afraid of taking her eyes off their attackers.

“Did Vizago know exactly how many weapons crates there were going to be here?”

She shook her head.

“Perfect,” Zeb said. Hera glanced over at him and gaped. He had turned and lifted one of the crates holding frag grenades so quickly no one had time to react. “Then he won’t be missing these!”

With a huge toss, the crate flew through the air and landed on top of one stormtrooper before bouncing and taking down a second. The grenades from inside scattered across the floor.

Everyone was frozen in place, stunned from the outburst. Kanan was the first to recover, a grin flashing across his face before firing at a trooper. His target dropped as Hera reached down for her blaster. An alarm started to blasting around them as the two troopers on the ground began to stand up again. She fired at one as Zeb charged the three Imperials still standing.

Hera and Kanan ran behind the crates, taking cover from the fire from the recovering trooper. “Okay, so maybe our luck did run out,” Kanan shouted as they ducked down.

“You think?” Hera shouted back, peering over the top of the crates. A blaster bolt landed in front of her. She flinched before randomly firing in the direction of the trooper. Her shots missed.

Kanan pulled her back down roughly. “We need a new plan!”

“Well, then think of one!”

Kanan frowned before standing up and firing at the trooper. Hera followed him, firing at the trooper entangled with Zeb. Both of their targets fell, give them a chance to think.

“How long until Spectre Three’s here?” Kanan asked vault over the crates to move next to Zeb.

“Minutes?” Hera answered. She turned to look out of the hangar. There wasn’t even a ship in the sky yet, no sign of Chopper at all.

“That rust bucket better show,” Zeb growled, kicking the head of a down stormtrooper.

Hera shot a glare at him before looking back outside again. The alarm was still blaring around them and the fact that reinforcements hadn’t arrived yet was bothering her. What were they waiting for?

“Uh, Hera?”

She turned back to ask what it was this time, but immediately saw what Zeb was referring to. Another group of stormtroopers—seven in total—had appeared, all charging towards them.

“Just be ready to leave once Chopper is here!” Kanan shouted. He fired a handful of shots at the troopers before running further into the hangar. Four of the stormtroopers peeled off to follow, while three continued towards Zeb and Hera.

Well, three was better than seven.

Zeb trotted over to her, dodging blaster shots as he did. They started firing. Hera tried to keep an eye on Kanan but soon had to focus on her fight. She trusted him not to die, and if he did, well then he was going to get a stern talking to after this was done.

Her target dropped giving her a view of the next delight from the Empire. “Great!” she shouted, ducking behind the crates. “Pilots!”

Two pilots had just coming running out into the hangar and towards the two TIE fighters closest to the exit.

Hera watched Zeb looked past the stormtroopers and swear. “Now what?”

“We take out the TIEs.”

He groaned in response and fired again. Hera stood up again and aimed at the final soldier. As they dropped, Zeb asked, “And how are we going to do that?”

Hera studied what was around her and grinned. She looked back over at Zeb and pointed to the frag grenades littered across the floor. “You said you wanted explosives.” He grinned back at her and they both ran to the mess Zeb had created at the start of the fight. Hera picked up a handful of grenades and passed one to Zeb. “Pick a target and I’ll hand you the grenades.”

Nodding, Zeb charged the grenade and aimed for a TIE fighter to their left, away from where they had seen Kanan run off. He used his whole body to throw the bomb and immediately accepted a second one from Hera.

As he accepted a third, the first two exploded. Hera covered her face for a moment before looking to see the damage. One of the stabilizers was completely gone, the whole fighter was now crashing onto the ground. Zeb let out a whoop as it fell. He reached over for another frag grenade when they heard an unwelcome sound. One of the other TIE fighters was getting turned on.

“Get to cover!” Zeb shouted, turning to Hera. She didn’t need to be told twice. They both ran in search of something to hide behind. They could hear the starfighter taking off and the cannons firing.

Zeb pushed Hera to the ground and dropped with her. They both covered their heads as green laser blasts from the TIE landed near them. Through the explosion they could hear the starfighter screeching as it flew out of the hangar.

“Come on,” Hera said, scrambling to her feet and then pulling Zeb to his. She led him back to the crates, her blaster raised. What her Blurrg-1120 could actually do against a TIE fighter wasn’t going much of anything (maybe leaving some carbon scoring along its exterior) but that wasn’t going to stop her from defending her team and their freshly stolen cargo.

Hera watched the TIE swooped through the air before turning to head back to the hangar. This was it; there was no chance of getting away. She tried to keep any thoughts of regrets she might have from filling her up. She had some, there was no denying that, but what good would thinking of them now do? She raised her blaster and hoped that somehow she could pull off a miracle.

But then, just before she could even attempt her grand stance against the starfighter, it exploded as it got into firing range. Hera stared out at the empty sky and lowered her blaster.

“ _ Whump whump! Whump whump! _ ”

Laughing, Hera lifted her comm up and exclaimed, “Chopper!”

Outside, the  _ Ghost _ came soaring past, firing at one of the parked transports. As the ship made its second pass, Hera heard Zeb laughing as well. Maybe they weren’t doomed to die this day.

The ship landed and Hera turned on the repulsors on one of the crates, running with it to the now lowering hatch. Once she was on board she shouted, “Spectre Three, make sure my ship ready to go the moment I’m in the cockpit!”

She didn’t wait for his response before running back out of the  _ Ghost _ . She passed Zeb, who was pushing two crates. Hera could hear blaster shots going off further in the hangar, Kanan seemed to still be fighting at least one trooper. She hoped that he could hold on until they had everything loaded up.

As quickly as they could, Zeb and Hera ran between the crates and the  _ Ghost _ . Hera was running back to grab one of the final three crates when she spotted two more pilots running out into the open. “We have to hurry!” she called over her shoulder to Zeb. She grabbed a crate and charged back to her ship. Zeb ran past her.

Instead of running back out, Hera made her way to the ladder out of the hold. “Get her ready to go, Chop!” she called up. She looked out of the cargo hold and saw Zeb, followed by Kanan, running with the final two crates. Hera shouted out to them, “Get on the guns as soon as you close up the ship!”

Trusting that they heard her, Hera clambered up the ladder. Once in the cockpit, she slid into the pilot’s seat and quickly checked that all the systems were running. “Chopper, get those shields up now, there’s going to be a lot of firefight once we’re in the air!”

He confirmed and moved to the port he worked from. Hera looked up and saw that the two TIE fighter pilots had gotten into their fighters. Reaching over, Hera flicked the internal comms on. “Boys, we really need to be in the air. Now.”

“ _ We’re all set! _ ” Kanan’s voice rang through into the cockpit. Hera pulled on the yolk, lifting the ship into the air. Movement below her told her that Zeb was in the nose turret.

“Just a normal day for us, huh, sweetheart?” Kanan asked as he climbed into the cockpit.

“You can try and be cute later,” Hera replied, the  _ Ghost _ rising into the air faster now. The sound of the TIEs leaving the hangar met them and Hera jerked the ship harshly to the right to avoid being hit by the pair. Kanan stumbled to the back of the cockpit they turned. “Right now I need you on guns.”

“On it,” he answered.

With the  _ swoosh _ of the door opening and closing, Hera focused on flying them out of here. The TIEs were making their pass of the  _ Ghost _ and Hera, hoping Kanan was in the turret by now, moved her ship into a nosedive. As she did this, the whole ship shook. “Report!”

Chopper responded quickly. They were taking fire from below. The ship flew across the open area of the base and Hera saw why: the ground turrets were finally being manned.

“Zeb, Kanan, you need to take out those ground turrets as well, or we won’t get out of here!” she yelled, swerving the ship around. The TIEs had broken up, each coming at her from opposite sides. An explosion and a howler of joy from Zeb told her that one of the turrets was down.

Yanking on the yolk hard, Hera to maneuvered her ship up. They shot up into the sky and she hoped that luck was finally on their side and the pilots would crash into each other. But when no sound of an explosion reached her, Hera sighed and levelled out the ship. Then, she cut the power to the engines. “Hang on! And you’ll know when to fire! Chopper redirect all power to shield and guns!” she shouted as the ship began to drop.

“I hate it when she says that,” Zeb grumbled from below.

“ _ Wait did she say ‘all power’? _ ” Kanan’s voice came through the comms. “ _ Hera! _ ”

The  _ Ghost _ began to pick up speed on its downward path. The TIEs’ screeching was coming up fast and Hera hope that Zeb and Kanan had figured out her plan; she had no time to try and explain it, she needed to be ready to get the power back on so they wouldn’t crash.

“Chopper, get ready to divert power back to the engines,” Hera said, watching the sensors on the control panel all light up furiously. They just needed to pass the TIEs in their fall and they’d be home free.

The sound of the guns firing made her grin. Just as one of the TIEs appeared in her viewport it immediately exploded in front of her, followed shortly by the sound of an explosion from behind the  _ Ghost _ . Her plan had actually worked. With the TIEs gone, they could now make their escape. And just in time; the ground was getting awfully close. Yelling over the blaring sensors, Hera called out, “Chopper, now!”

And a second later, lights indicating her engines were working lit up and Hera pulled her ship up into a tight spin, dodging any shots fired from the remaining turret. Zeb and Kanan fired a wave of cover fire as Hera soared off from the base.

It was only when they were safely in hyperspace and Kanan had made his way back from his turret, squeezing her shoulders gently (and kissing her cheek before Zeb joined them), that Hera let out a long and somewhat shaky breath. She was both charged and exhausted. But mostly she was grateful. Her crew, her family, had pulled through like they always did. Hera looked back at them and smiled. They made a good team.

And this team had gotten their payload.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second last chapter!
> 
> Writing a flight sequence is really hard. It took a long time for it to make any sense and what I learned is that I never want to write a flying scene ever again (which means I will, every time I say never for fic stuff I just end up doing it again). But I'm pretty proud with how it turned out. I think it flows. God, I hope it does. 
> 
> The last chapter will be posted on Friday (maybe Thursday, we'll see how I'm feeling but most likely Friday).


	9. On to the Next

Hera huffed as the comms cut out. She was starting to realize what a _pleasure_ it was going to be to work with Vizago again in the future. Even just a short conversation confirming that they were on their way to Lothal left her more irritated than the entire mission had. Leaning back in the pilot’s seat, Hera closed her eyes.

“He’s a real pain,” Kanan said from the co-pilot’s seat. There was a forced ease in his voice that grated on her. She opened her eyes only so that she could throw a glare at him. “Yeah, yeah, we were the ones who met him. It’s all our fault.”

“Good, as long as you’re both aware,” Hera replied, closing her eyes again.

“Doesn’t really seem fair, since this all worked out,” she heard Zeb whisper to Kanan, though not quietly enough in the contained space of the cockpit for her not to catch it. What she didn’t hear was a typical chuckle in response. She was so used to Kanan and Zeb teaming up that this surprised her. She looked over at Zeb, who shrugged and leaned away.

Hera started to turn back to the console in front of her before flashing a smile at the two with her. “At least we have a decent amount of time until we reach Lothal, so we don’t have to brave Vizago’s attitude for a good while.”

“It’s the small victories,” Zeb announced, laughing as he spoke.

She grinned back at him before letting her eyes flicker over to Kanan. His face was set in a tight expression, not quite frowning but not at all relaxed. He was staring out the viewport now. It was hard to tell if he was even listening to them anymore.

Then, a loud flurry of noise made all three of them turn to see Chopper in the hatchway of the cockpit.

“No, Chopper. You can’t sabotage the weapons just because the mission was boring for you,” Hera said, shaking her head.

“What’s he complaining about? He got to fly the _Ghost_ and blow up a TIE _and_ he was never in any danger!” Zeb exclaimed, glaring down at Chopper.

Loud whistles flew through the cockpit as he charged right into Zeb’s leg. Swearing, Zeb stood up as Chopper scuttled away, chortling as he did.

“You’re lucky your Hera’s droid…” Zeb said and then looked over at her. “What did he just say to me?”

“You really don’t want to know,” Hera answered, shaking her head and smiling sympathetically.

Zeb grumbled something under his breath before making for the exit. “I’m going to sleep,” he said. “I can’t handle Chopper attacking me on top of Kanan’s weird mood.”

Kanan glared up at him before turning back to the viewport. Zeb shrugged again and walked out.

Wincing at the sound of what Hera assumed was Zeb trying to kick her droid, who appeared to have been waiting for Zeb to follow him out, she turned to face in the same direction as Kanan. She started tapping the console in front of her and waited. Everything on it was reading as normal, there was no reason for her to stay here any longer. She should have been ready to go to bed. But something was keeping her on edge—there was no chance that she’d get to sleep any time soon.

She kept glancing over at Kanan who was still staring out into the blue of hyperspace. Everything about him was tight. Closed off. It seemed like he wasn’t even aware of her anymore, just sitting and trying to shut her and galaxy out. Tension pulsed off of him, there was no way she could ignore it.

She looked around the cockpit, trying to find somewhere to rest her eyes that wasn’t Kanan. She hated when things got tense between them. It threw everything off kilter. Hera especially hated when she couldn’t figure out why things were wrong.

Finally, when she couldn’t handle waiting for him to come to her, Hera turned her chair towards him.

“What’s going on with you?” she demanded, crossing her arms. Kanan looked up at her, surprise written across his face. “You’ve been in a weird mood since the job. I get that things didn’t go as planned but we’re all fine and we’re getting paid, so what’s the matter?”

“I’m just tired,” he answered. He turned his chair to her, though it didn’t feel like an invitation for her to continue prodding. She didn’t care.

“Kanan, I know when you’re ‘just tired’ and I know when you’re trying hiding something from me,” Hera said.

He leaned back in his seat, rubbing his eyes with one hand. “It’s nothing, Hera. I’ll get over it.”

“Nuh-uh. Talk.”

He looked her over and frowned. She frowned back at him. Sometimes she would let it go, if it was clear that he was just tired or if whatever bothering him was minor. But her thoughts kept going back to when they were pressed against each other and he was trying to bury his pain by feeling her. No, she wasn’t going to let it go this time.

“Kanan, talk to me.”

He turned away from her. Hera figured he was trying to push her out and made to start talking again when he sighed. “It really is nothing,” he started. He swallowed roughly before looking back at her. “And mostly, I am just tired. It’s been a long couple of days. It’s just that, this job? It reminded me of what I’m not.”

“That you’re not?” Hera asked quietly, even though she knew the answer.

“That I’m not a Jedi. That I’m not strong enough to protect you,” he said. His voice was bitter. Kanan kept his eyes on her but she could feel a distance growing between them. “If I was still that person, I could have kept you and Zeb from getting hurt. This whole job, it was almost ruined because I’m not everything I could be. Should be.”

“Are you saying that you should have brought your lightsaber with you? Or, what, used the Force to stop the TIE fighter?”

“I don’t know. Maybe. I could have done something more!” Kanan snapped. It sharper than she had heard him be in a long time, he rarely let his anger get the best of him.  Even when they are at odds. “I could have done more than just watch it happen. I should have done more.”

The next thing he said came out barely more than a whisper; she almost didn’t hear him. “If I was still Caleb… I would have been able to do more.”

Hera bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from saying the first thing that had popped into her head. Calling him stupid or ridiculous wasn’t going to fix this problem—it would just hurt him more. She took a breath in and let it out before standing up. She didn’t even have to take a full step to be at his chair. Hera put her hand on it and turned him to face her. Then, she cupped his cheek.

Hera looked into his eyes before offering him a small smile, and said, “Kanan, listen to me when I tell you that you could not have done more. I’m not going to tell you what to do when it comes to the Force, but believe me, having you flounce around as a Jedi would not have helped us out there. We survive these battles because the Empire deems us unimportant. It’s why we keep surviving; they underestimate us.”

“This time.”

“Kanan…”

He frowned and cast his eyes down. Lifting his face up, Hera took another half step forward, forcing him to part his legs so she could stand between them, pressed against the chair. “If and when you are ready to be a Jedi, you know you’ll have my full support. But don’t go there out of guilt. It is not your sole responsibility to keep us safe. You’re not alone anymore, love. We’re a team.”

Slowly, afraid that she might startling him, Hera leaned down and pressed her forehead against his. He closed his eyes as his right hand moved up to hold onto her arm. She felt him squeeze gently. Closing her eyes as well, they held this pose for what felt like an eternity.

Eventually, Kanan’s hand slid up past her shoulder to rest at the back of her neck, but he made no other move forward. So, Hera did. She shifted her head so she could press her lips against his. He responded, but only barely. Just enough to say that he had kissed her back. He was hurting. He didn’t fully believe her words, that much was clear.

Hera pulled away. They both had their eyes open now. Kanan offered a weak smiled. “You should go rest,” he said.

She sighed and nodded. She stood up straight but didn’t take a step back. Kanan’s hand dropped from her neck and land on his thigh. He stared up at her, though Hera wondered if he was seeing the person he loved or if his mind was already somewhere else entirely.

Kanan raised an eyebrow when she hadn’t moved to leave. “Hera?”

Shaking her head, Hera cupped his face again, this time with both hands, and kissed his forehead. Then, she moved back to his mouth.

“We’re going to be fine,” Hera said after pulling away, her voice soft and filled with as much love as she could put in. She ran one of her hands across his hair before sliding it back to the side of his face. “This was a close call, closer than any of us liked. But we survived. We’re alive. We got the job done and we might even get steady work out of it. No one is hurt beyond healing. We’ve all got scars, Kanan, but those fade. We are going to be okay.”

Kanan nodded. He didn’t move to pull her closer. She smiled weakly at him.

“You’re a good man, Kanan,” Hera said before pressing her lips against his again. She felt him start to give into her touch this time, though not as much as she would have liked.

When she pulled away, Hera saw him trying to relax his face into something that seemed happy, or at least on the path to happy. He smiled up at her, his eyes showing how drained he was from their job and from just being, and responded, “I try.” He pulled her back down and brushed his lips against her cheek. “I try.”

Hera felt her heart clench at his words. She brought him into a hug, leaning down to wrap her arms around his shoulders and neck. His went to her back, bringing her in as close as their position allowed.

She did know how hard Kanan tried. He worked every day to stay on top of the trauma that he had suffered. It was still haunting him. He worked hard to be the partner and the friend and the person she needed him to be. He told her recently that he was starting to let the Force be a part of himself again, opening a door he had assured her would be closed forever. She saw just how hard he tried every day.

But, she also saw his hesitation. All it seemed that he was doing was meditating when things got to be too much. She never saw him training with the lightsaber tucked away in an almost forgotten drawer. While his moves when they were in the field were impressive, no one would ever think that this man was once going to be a knight for the Republic. Most people saw Kanan and just thought he was lucky.

Maybe one day Kanan be would be the Jedi that Hera hoped he could be. That she thought he could be. Maybe he would just stay Kanan. She didn’t know what could possibly push him to take the final steps to calling himself one again. Hera knew it wasn’t going to be something she could do. His future was a mystery to both of them. All she could do was hope that he would choose what was right when the time came.

“I need to get out of these clothes. And a shower before going to bed would be great, I think,” Hera stated after awhile (her side was starting to ache from the strained position), straightening as she did so. She smiled down at him and raised an eyebrow before taking a step back towards the door. But, all Kanan did in response was nod and turn his chair to look out the viewport, watching the blue streak of light surround and soar past their ship, their home. Hera smiled and shook her head; clearly he hadn’t understood what she meant. “It’ll be hard, though. I can’t quite get at my zipper, you know, with my side. The twisting.”

Kanan turned back to her. “What do you—oh. _Oh_.”

She smirked down at him which quickly turned into laughing as he jumped up from his seat. He closed the short distance between them and placed a hand on her waist. “I think I can manage unzipping a shirt.”

“I would hope so,” she teased, her laughter weaving into the words. She stepped out of his hold and made her way to leave the cockpit, Kanan a half step behind her.

Later, after careful maneuvering in the shower and finally some laughter from Kanan, they found themselves wrapped in each other’s arms and lying in Hera’s bunk. Her head was resting against his shoulder, her lekku laying over his arm and her arm draped low across his stomach. He was barely tracing lines on her exposed back; sleep almost had a complete hold on him.

She was awake. Her mind wasn’t organized enough to drift off just yet. She knew that she needed to figure out what they were and what they could be. But, here in his arms, she didn’t want to. Just like on Felucia, there was still a big part of Hera that just wanted to be with him. She wondered what they could have been in another life, a life without war. She wondered if they even would have met.

Sighing, Hera closed her eyes and moved her thigh up Kanan’s legs to try and get more comfortable. He responded only by pulling her more on top of him. She smiled.

Maybe there wasn’t room for romance in their lives right now, if ever. One day, and one day soon, she was going to have to figure out how Kanan and her could go with loving each other. The galaxy demanded a lot and she wanted to give the galaxy what it needed. Romance was going to be off the table. But while romance might not be a possibility, Hera knew that there was always going to be room for love. There was always room for love in this galaxy. And she did love Kanan.

She ran her hand across his bare chest, listening to his breath hitch slightly as her fingers moved, and nestled against him more. Yes, she loved him; she could admit that much to herself. Closing her eyes, she waited for sleep to overtake them and thought that maybe one day they would have a chance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are at the end. It feels pretty good to see this completed. Weird, though. I started working on this story about a year ago. It started as an outline in this tiny notebook I bring to work with me and now it's a 23k word story. I'm proud of how it's turned it. I've had a complicated relationship with this story but I think I can say that I have learned a great deal about writing and how I write from this. I made a lot of mistakes in the process but in the end I still have a completed story.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who helped me get through this. To my friend Heather who read the first 6 chapters before anyone else to let me know if I actually had something worth sharing. To Gwen who edited the half of this fic; I wouldn't have been able to get this ball rolling without you. To everyone online who watched me go on and on and complain and complain about this story but still encouraged me to keep going. 
> 
> And most importantly, thank you to everyone who read this. Whether you left a comment, kudo, or nothing, knowing you were out there reading this means so much to me. We write for ourselves, putting out into the world what we want to see, but there's no point if there are no readers. You guys are why this fic is here. Thank you.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this story. Maybe I'll see your names when I start posting my next multi chapter fic. You know, if we all survive watching the end of Rebels. 
> 
> Again, thank you so much. 
> 
> (Damn, I'm getting surprisingly emotional about this.)


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